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Curling into a ball on my side, I close my eyes and focus on breathing. In and out. In and out, I allow my world to shrink down to just the air in my lungs, until I’m calm and everything is quiet and still, where it’s just me, alone.
* * *
I’m startled awake by someone hammering on the door to the room. “Penelope, open the fucking door,” Hawthorn growls angrily, his fist banging loudly against the wood.
Blinking awake, I sleepily make my way to the door and quickly unlock it.
Pushing the door open, the moment I turn the lock, he barges into the room, his chest heaving, his eyes dark and furious. “What the fucking hell, Penelope?” he snarls.
“What?” I ask, my voice full of sleep, even though my body is fully awake thanks to his angry invasion.
“What the fuck do you think you’re playing at?”
“I must have fallen asleep,” I say, a hint of anger slipping into my own voice in the face of his fury.
“Bullshit, you’re fucking running again.”
“No, I’m not,” I cry. “I came to get my stuff, sat on the bed, and I fell asleep. It’s not a crime, Hawthorn, it’s a nap.”
“So you weren’t planning on trying to stay here tonight? You were coming home?” he asks, some of the anger leaching from his tone.
“I’m not allowed into my home, and I’ve never been to yours. Was I planning on going back to the boat? Yes, I was,” I snap, annoyed with this conversation.
“What?”
“Nothing, just forget it. Give me a minute to pack up my stuff, and we can go,” I say, sighing as I cross to the bathroom and scan the room, realizing nothing in here is actually mine.
“It’s not nothing, what do you mean you’ve never been to my home? We’ve slept there the last two nights.”
Inhaling sharply, I clench my hands into fists at my sides and spin around to look at him. “We’ve spent the last two nights on your boat.”
“Yeah,” he says with a confused shrug.
“So that’s not your home, it’s the place you take girls to fuck them,” I hiss, pushing past him to the dressing table, gathering up my few possessions and shoving them into my bag.
“Stop,” he demands, and my body complies before my mind can tell him to go and shove his demand up his ass.
“Look at me.”
Grinding my teeth together, I ignore him, opening the dresser and pulling my handful of underwear from inside.
“Penelope, turn the fuck around and look at me.”
I want to fight and disobey him, but there’s just something about the tone of his voice that I simply cannot ignore. Slowly, I pivot around, bracing my hands against the wooden countertop to keep me in place.
“The only women who have set foot on my boat are my mom, your sister, and you. The only woman I’ve ever fucked on my boat is you. The only woman who has ever slept in my bed on my boat is you. Do you see a pattern yet, Princess? The Escape is mine, it’s my favorite place in the world, and I don’t just share that with everyone. At my parents’ house, I’ve fucked girls on the sofas, in the den, in the pool, in my bedroom. If I’d have taken you to my house, it would have been me treating you like you were just another girl. Taking you to my boat and asking you to live there with me, that’s me treating you like you’re mine,” he growls, closing the distance between us in a single stride and cupping my cheeks with his palms.
My anger dissolves like mist and I stare up at him.
“So why are you here instead of at home with me?” he asks, his voice softer now as he crowds me, pushing his chest into me and pressing as much of his body against mine as he can given our height difference.
“I just came to get my stuff.”
His smile is soft and sweet. “And now the real reason.”
Sighing I roll my eyes. “I just needed a minute. So much has happened in the last few days, and I just needed a moment to pause and breathe somewhere quiet.”
“You can’t breathe with me?” There’s a tinge of hurt in his voice, but his eyes just look a little sad.
