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My disappointment dissolves when I see it’s a message from Hawthorn.
Hawthorn
Where the fuck are you? Why aren’t you in class?
I read and reread his message, wondering why he even cares where I am. We’re not a couple. I don’t really know what we are, but whatever it is, I doubt it’s the type of relationship where he’d worry about me if I wasn’t where I was expected to be. For a minute, I think about not replying, then I realize that he’s literally the only person I want to talk to, even though I know I shouldn’t. I don’t understand his agenda anymore, the will is broken, and my sister is free. Only he doesn’t seem to want anything from me except my compliance and my body, he doesn’t care that I gave away a fortune, he doesn’t even expect me to be nice.
Me
I had a headache, so I left.
Lifting the comforter, I crawl beneath the covers, then roll to my side, placing my palm beneath my cheek and closing my eyes. My cell beeps again, and I sigh. I want to talk to him, but at the same time, I don’t. He belongs to my sister, he’s her friend, so I should stay away, but after this afternoon, it feels like he’s a tiny bit mine too.
Hawthorn
What hotel are you at?
I absolutely should not tell him where I am. He could come, or he could tell Izzy to come, and I refuse to allow her to see me this pathetic. But I still type out a reply, secretly hoping that a small part of him actually cares.
Me
The Haywood.
Hawthorn
Room number?
His response is immediate, like he was watching his screen waiting for my reply.
Me
Why?
Hawthorn
Room number? Don’t make me ask again.
I don’t know why I’m stalling, I’m going to tell him, I always was, even though I know I shouldn’t.
Me
459.
I hold my breath as I wait for him to reply, but nothing comes. The two blue ticks show that he read it, but he never texts back. Refusing to admit how disappointed I am, I close my eyes and fall asleep, ready for today to be over.
13
HAWTHORN
My limbs feel like they’re full of static electricity as I watch the clock tick down till the end of the day. A part of me wants to just get up and walk out of class, but making a scene will have too many people asking questions that I’m not ready to answer.
I blew Gulliver off when he asked what happened to me at lunch, but I know sooner or later they’re going to expect me to tell them what has me smiling like an asshole one minute, then scowling like I’m ready to kill someone the next moment. Princess has that effect on me. After she walked away from the darkroom earlier, I was fucking euphoric, high off the endorphins and excitement of touching, playing, and fucking her again.
Having her panties in my pocket while I sat in history was exhilarating, but the more time that passed, the quicker the excitement drained. I have no idea what the fuck I’m doing with Penelope. I don’t know if I want her or if I just want to fuck her. I don’t know if I can look past all the awful things she’s done or if there will never be a place in my life or in my family for her.
I know Izzy is more than ready to start fresh with her sister, and though Gulliver, Davis, and Kip would accept her as Izzy’s twin, would they ever accept her as one of us if she were mine?
The moment the bell rings, I stuff my laptop into my bag and barge my way out of the classroom, eager to get to my car. When I got to school this morning, my plans for this evening were to do my homework, then meet the guys at some charity event we’d RSVP’d for, back when we were still trying to make sure everyone important knew Izzy wasn’t her sister. Only now, instead of going to the marina, I find myself handing my keys to the valet outside the Haywood Hotel.
