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24
Carrigan
Ican tell I’ve shocked him. I’ve shocked myself that I actually said it, that I’m verbalizing all the garbled angry thoughts that have been swirling around inside of me for the last two days.
His attention turns back to the road for a moment, before he looks at me again, his lips parted as if he’s going to speak. The entrance to the marina forces his attention back to the road as he pulls onto to the lot and parks in his usual space.
Arlo’s huge SUV pulls up at our side and our moment to talk privately is lost in a flurry of doors opening and us moving as a group toward his boat. Without thought, I enter the galley and move to the huge armchair, kicking off my shoes and curling into the chair as if the huge overstuffed thing can protect me from this stupid meeting that I called.
My plan this morning was to be a total badass, demand a meeting, then run off to have a meltdown that I demanded a meeting. Only of course that didn’t happen and instead Carson was there and all my badass melted into a puddle of want and lust and need for him. Now I’m here in the meeting I asked for, feeling like a fool and wishing I could leave but knowing that I can’t, especially not now I jumped into Carson’s arms and basically told the whole world I was sleeping with him.
After a few minutes I realize that the room is silent and when I look up, all eyes are on me. I catch Carson’s eye and he must see that I’m struggling because he marches across the room, picks me up out the chair and sits back down with me in his lap.
“Carrigan and I fucked to break the will,” he announces, as calmly as if he just asked what the time was.
“Carson,” I gasp, shocked that he just announced it, just like that.
Olly’s hyena laugh is loud and so compelling that even though I’m horrified, I can’t help but want to smile until Tally reaches over and slaps him to make him shut up.
Turning, I glare at Carson, but he just shrugs at me completely unapologetic.
“I like her, she likes me, we’re together. Anyone got a problem with that?” he asks boldly, looking between his friends and waiting for them to say something.
Glancing at my sister I find her face buried in her hands, but I can still see the pink embarrassed tinge to her skin. I don’t know if she’s embarrassed that we fucked, or that he just blurted it out, but either way I open my mouth to speak.
“But she’s a bitch, she’s the enemy,” Watsons says.
The need to defend myself surges forward and I move to stand, but Carson’s arm bands around my waist stopping me.
“The only people she did any wrong to in this room are Tally and Arlo. But she put that right, she broke the will, fucking herself over in the process,” Carson argues.
“Look,” I say interrupting him. “I am a bitch, I don’t deny that. I’ve definitely done unforgivable, evil things, but I’m trying to change. What happened to Tallulah made me really see what we were doing.”
“Stop,” my sister shouts. “Carrigan you don’t have to explain yourself to him. You saved me, you saved both of us and as far as I’m concerned we’re good, you’re my twin,” she implores.
Ignoring everyone else, I focus on my sister. “I’m so sorry. I don’t think I’ve actually told you how sorry I am. I was so jealous of you our entire lives and then the will happened and they were interested in me, I was important,” I tell her, tears filling my eyes. “I really wanted to be important to them. I’m not trying to excuse everything I’ve done, but I went from being invisible, to being special. To Mom and Dad lavishing all this attention on me and the more compliant I was, the more I did as they said, the more attentive they were. I knew it was wrong but it wasn’t till that day, when they attacked you, that I really saw how toxic our relationship with them was.”
“It’s okay,” Tallulah says.
“No it’s not.”
“It is, because I think I would have done the same if I’d been the one named in that will,” she says quietly, getting up from her chair and moving toward me.
Compelled, I stand too, meeting her half way across the room. “No, you wouldn’t,” I say as I accept the hug she offers me, carefully wrapping my arms around my twin and taking the comfort she’s giving me, even though I don’t deserve it.
“Carrigan is going to move in here with me,” Carson announces, his posture relaxed as he lounges in the chair I just vacated.
“She’s what?” Arlo shouts.
“I’m what?” I cry.
“You’re moving in here with me,” Carson says, his eyes daring me to argue.
“No, I’m not.”
“She can come and stay with us,” Arlo says, smiling softly at my sister who is now in his arms.
“She’s not moving in with me,” Watson says, beneath his breath but loud enough that we can all hear him.
