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Still, feeling the knife so close to my center does cause my eyes to snap open, and I stare at him with desperation burning my face. “Please don’t,” I beg him, my eyes finding his. “Please, Kayde, please.”
“Please what?” he whispers, the knife trailing ever closer. “Please…what, Summer?”
“Please don’t do this.” I can’t help that I’m crying, and I can’t help the way my hands jerk at the cuffs every few seconds, my arms twisting. “I don’t want?—”
“I know what you want, baby. You want to stab me. You want to be a brat. Where’s that energy now, I wonder?” He lifts the blade to tap it against his own lip. “It’s not because of this, is it? Just my little knife here against your skin?”
I can’t answer. I don’t answer, because it’s clear he’s taunting me and I can’t think of a single answer that won’t make this worse. But I do give another soft, anguished noise when the knife is back, the tip sliding against my folds and causing me to freeze.
Every muscle in my body goes so still that I ache, muscles knotted, and I swear I don’t even breathe as I look at his face, at his concentration while he drags the blade up and down, then repeats it.
“You’re so good at following directions,” he murmurs at last, eyes flicking up to mine for a few seconds before going back to what he’s doing. “So good at being so still for me. My good fucking girl. Do you want me to fuck you?” The shift in topic nearly gives me whiplash, and my brain is working at such a low capacity all I can do is stare at him.
“If not, that’s okay. I like this game too. We can keep playing, though my hand might get tired. I really might slip and…” He shrugs. “We never did decide on a place for that to happen, did we?”
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head. “Kayde?—”
“Do you want me to fuck you, Summer?”
I’m not spaced out enough to not understand what he wants. Worse, the reality of this game sinks into my chest like a stone thrown out onto a lake. Has this been what he wants all along? To present me with the choice of whether I’ll beg him to fuck me?
There’s no real choice involved, he knows that. I wish more than anything I was brave enough to deny him, to shrug this off and tell him to do what he wants. The words even bubble up my throat tantalizingly, tingeing my mouth with the copper of blood.
Do what you want, is what I want to say. I want to shrug, to look away, and just sigh, like this is the most boring thing in the world.
But I can’t. He fucking knows I can’t, and the pleased look on his face tells me he probably has a pretty good idea of where my thoughts are heading. One day, in another life, I hope some higher power sees fit to reincarnate Kayde as a beetle and me as an elephant so I can stomp him out of existence.
My heart flutters, my throat working convulsively to swallow the response that burns and claws its way up my throat. Hands shifting in the cuffs, I close my eyes hard and whisper, “Yes,” with as much conviction as I can.
But of course it isn’t enough.
“Yes, what?” Kayde purrs, the knife still tracing along my hips. “Be more specific?—”
“I want you to fuck me.” The words are numb on my lips, and my skin tingles.
“You’re not very convincing.” He strokes the knife along my folds this time, and I feel the well of tears against my eyelids, the burn of saline that begs to fall and stain my skin in a desperate attempt to get him to feel bad for what he’s doing. To get him to stop. “I think you’d rather me do this?—”
“Please, Kayde.” I open my eyes, blinking away the tears that cascade down the sides of my face. “Please, I need you to fuck me.” It’s so hard to let my thighs fall to the sides from where they’ve been in the air, shaking, as I wish more than anything I can press them together and keep him out. “I wanted—” I swallow hard, fixing my gaze on his. “I thought about it when we first met, you know?” Though I hadn’t. Not really.
But I can be convincing.
“You were so fucking pretty, and I was so goddamn high. I thought maybe we’d get lost in the woods and you’d pin me to a tree and fuck me. Thought you’d be really good at it, and imagined what you’d sound like.” My words never falter, and his grin grows slowly until he looks completely psychotic. Which, in my opinion, is exactly what he is.
“You know, my favorite thing about you is how much you surprise me,” Kayde admits, once more sitting back on his heels. Approval glitters in his gaze, and when he reaches out to stroke up my thigh, it’s with his fingers instead of a blade. I relax, just a touch, and I swear I see his eyes flick up to my face for a singular moment before he goes back to pressing my thighs wider, his hands warm on my skin.
“Who taught you to lie like that, hmm?” he purrs. “Who taught you to be that convincing when we both know you’re just so scared?” His fingers drift further up my thighs, pressing between them until he’s spreading me with one hand and pressing the other flat against my hip.
“Not a lie,” I protest through gritted teeth, even though we both know it isn’t true. “Want you?—”
“Sure, baby. I’m just so sure you do. Crying like that and shaking because you thought I was going to cut you, and you actually want to convince me you’ve wanted this?” I don’t need to meet his eyes to know he’s giving me the look that means he sees right through me.
“If you’re complaining about my lack of excitement”—I bite down on my lower lip when I feel his thumb brush over my clit—“then I invite you to start the night over but lose the knife.”
“Nah, I’m not complaining about anything,” Kayde assures me. “Sweetheart, I have all the time in the world to convince you to enjoy this. And your reactions to a bit of knife play were perfect. Gorgeous.” He leans over me, nose brushing mine. My eyes flick up to his, and I search his face as he holds himself still over me.
“Perfect, Summer,” he whispers, kissing me softly before I can say a word. And yet again, his words and actions bring that squirming, confused feeling back to the surface, causing me to press my thighs together around his hand for completely different reasons than fear.
But he’s just so good at this. I can admit that. I can admit that while I hate him, and I really would like to see him topple off of a five story cliff, he’s gorgeous as fuck and apparently blessed by the sex gods to be some kind of prophet amongst mortals.
