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“Why?” he asked. “It’s what their son and daughter-in-law wanted.”
She toyed with a wrinkle on the duvet. “That still surprises me. A lot. And given the fact my father has my cell phone number and didn’t call me after the lawyer spoke with him, I won’t be surprised if my own parents contest Gail’s decisions, as well.”
Silence followed, then a quiet, “The reason you’re estranged from them…It’s about more than you not wanting to conform to their expectations, isn’t it?”
She nodded.
“Tell me.”
“I was the black sheep and I could never do anything right. Our family was new to the world of wealth. We weren’t like you Whitcombs, with generations and generations of money and power and prestige behind you. Nope, my dad made a fortune early on selling stocks, and made sure everyone knew we had money. And that everyone knew we had a ‘place’ in society. Even if we didn’t.”
“Sounds like your dad has issues.”
“Yeah, that about sums it up. But Gail and I had to be ambassadors for our family. We had to play the part. Act the role. Be ladies. Gail got an A+. I failed. But it wasn’t just Dad who was disappointed in me.”
When she hesitated going further, Jamie caught her hand, which was still playing with the fold in the duvet, and entwined his fingers with hers.
“I used to date Mason.”
“Wait…your brother-in-law?”
She nodded. “He was the first guy I slept with. I thought we were going to get married. But then I overheard our dads talking to him, encouraging him to break up with me. Encouraging him to date Gail, who’d be better suited for him. When he broke up with me, he said I didn’t fit the image of someone he’d need by his side when he took the political world by storm. He said—he said I embarrassed him. Just like I embarrassed my dad.”
Her voice quavered and Jamie mentally cursed, knowing how difficult it was for her to admit this all to him. Damn her father and ex-boyfriend for making her doubt her own worth.
Jamie took a deep breath and chose his words carefully. “I hate to speak ill of the dead, but he didn’t deserve you, Luce.”
“I know that, but I loved him. I thought he accepted me, and to know my own father and my sister thought so little of me…Cared so little of my feelings…Well, obviously fifteen years later I still wasn’t over it. With Gail gone, it seems so stupid now. I know that. But I can’t change the past.”
“So…is that how you think of me? That just because I have money, I’d do something like that…think something like that?”
She shook her head. “You’re not like that, Jamie. But the fact remains, you come from a world that expects certain things from people. Old money. Big business. Corporate America. I don’t want to have to change who I am to fit in.”
She looked at him, as if waiting for him to say she didn’t need to change to be with him, but he hesitated. When her expression closed up, he cupped her face in his hands.
“I wish I could say that you should never be anything but yourself and fuck the rest of the world, but that would be naïve. People make concessions all the time. Should you let others demean you? Make you feel bad about who you are? Absolutely not. Is it selling out to refrain from calling someone an asshole, even if he is an asshole, to maintain a business relationship? Maybe. Maybe not. But bottom line, each individual has to decide. Each has to commit, whether it’s to living in a certain place or living with a certain person, and damn those who’ll try to make you feel out of place. I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who isn’t willing to do that. With someone who’ll walk away when things get tough.”
“Like I did from my parents, you mean?”
She pulled away until his hands dropped.
“I understand Mason hurt you,” he said quietly. “That what your sister and your father did hurt you most of all. But that could have happened in any family, rich or poor. You’ve focused your hurt on the fact that you and Mason came from money. You wanted out of that world so much that you didn’t see your sister for fifteen years. By the time you did…”
“By the time I did, it was too late.” She smiled bitterly. “So what now? Our one night and the morning after are just about over, and you told me you didn’t want to be my friend, remember?”
“And at the time I was practically green with jealousy. We are friends, Lucy. You don’t have to tackle this alone. I’ll help you in any way I can. As for the rest of today, I know you’ve gotten a shock about Milly. You need time to process that—”
“Thank you, but please don’t tell me what I need.” She smiled brightly. “Obviously Mason’s sister isn’t going to let me have contact with Milly. The lawyer will be emailing the paperwork I need to review, and I’ll get on that first thing in the morning. But right now, we only have a few hours before I head back to California and you…?”
“I’ll be heading back to California, as well. For my sister’s wedding on Coronado Island.”
She nodded. “Right. Well, before we go, I’d just as soon focus on something other than what a terrible mother Mason’s family thinks I’d be.” She smoothed her hand over his chest, then slid a palm down to squeeze the hardening bulge between his legs. “Why not focus on one of my favorite things?”
He knew what she was doing, using sex to once again deflect emotion. But he’d take it. Because when they’d made love, she’d lowered her guards and given him her. And his time to enjoy that again was running out. “By all means, let’s take advantage of those hours.”
