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“Oh!” Again, Lady Natoi clapped her hands in excitement, nearly jumping up and down. “Please tell His Imperial Highness I’m honored and of course I will be there.”
“I beg your forgiveness, Lady Natoi, but the invitation is not for you. It is for Lady Heather,” the Myx corrected without much emotion.
My heart skipped a beat. Me? My moment of excitement died when I saw the expression of utter envy and disdain on Lady Natoi’s face. Her features turned downward as her eyes assessed me coldly, making me actually shiver. “And just how does the emperor know you?”
“I…” I felt like a deer caught in headlights under her stare, without being able to say why, something in her eyes warned me off. “I accidentally met him yesterday when I retrieved your scarf,” I finally admitted, unwilling to mention the emperor’s and my second encounter at the park earlier.
“Hmm, interesting. And why my dear, have you not mentioned that to me yesterday? Don’t you think it would have been worth a few lines like, ah, let me see”—she pretended to think—“by the way Lady Natoi I ran into the emperor?”
“I’m sorry Lady Natoi, I was a bit distraught,” I said with a faint smile, hoping to endear myself back into her good graces. “And we were in such a rush to meet Sir Naximus and his sons.”
She shook her head. “A fine mess you have gotten yourself into now, a fine mess.”
“Can I tell the emperor you will attend dinner with him tonight?” the messenger inquired, drawing our attention back to him.
“Of course,” Lady Natoi chirped, putting a false mask of excitement on. “Tell His Imperial Highness she will be there.”
The mask stayed on her features until the Myx left, then she returned to her cold stare, directing it at me. “I suppose I will have to dress you and prepare you on the proper etiquette when talking to the emperor.”
Too late, I nearly giggled as my nerves were getting the better of me.
Questioning my sanity and impatiently awaiting the merrily, I paced my living quarters where I had ordered the food to be brought tonight. Right after running into her at the park today, I made the plan to invite her for dinner. Now hours later, I questioned my—so unlike me—impulsive behavior.
I had never invited merrilies to dine with me, alone, hating the idea of the ensuing gossip afterward. The speculations.
My councilors, advisors, and various committee members had made it abundantly clear that it was time for me to find an empress and beget a little emperor who would follow in my footsteps should the unthinkable happen. The unthinkable, as in my death.
I was aware of my responsibilities as an emperor and, most of all, of my duty to procreate. I gave the empire my all, day in and day out. I had not only inherited this title, but I had also fought to keep it. Hard. So why was I lacking in the one thing that would surely topple the Pandraxian Empire, or at least cause a ripple of unimaginable proportions? My indecision to find an empress could cost the lives of many of my subjects.
I wiggled my fingers in my clasped hands behind my back and stared out through the window at the part of my empire that literally lay in front of my feet. So many people were coming and going, strato gliders flew this way and that, and were stuck in traffic one behind the other on invisible tracks.
Deep inside my heart was an ache that had been there ever since I could remember. An ache for something I could never define. It was always with me, the same as the seemingly perpetual anger and frustration. My trustworthy companions through thick and thin.
There were only a few times when I experienced neither of these discomforts, but they were few and far between. They only happened when I was alone or with either of my friends, my brothers of the heart, Garth and Xandros. When we let loose and were just us. Not the emperor, not the lord protector, and not the superior commander. When we behaved just as the terrible triplets were expected to behave, having fun.
I didn’t even remember the last time we shared a moment like that, or where even just two of us were together without having to talk about this burden or that. When was the last time I felt like I could breathe freely?
Last night and this afternoon, the answer came unspoken, lingering in the back of my mind. Last night and this afternoon, in the company of the human merrily. Unexpected encounters that left me soothed and relaxed.
Something I had never experienced in the company of any other merrily. Encounters with them usually left me more unnerved than anything. No merrily had ever come to me without requesting something. None had ever seen the male in me. Only the emperor and the power a union with him would bring.
Granted, I didn’t know what Heather might think of my invitation or my interest in her. So far our encounters had been purely by chance, or so I believed at least. The possibility that she had arranged them had entered my mind—I was a very distrustful male—but I had dismissed the idea, for now. I would see what tonight would bring.
I sensed her spirit was just as adrift as mine in this vast universe. A spirit I very much wanted to get to know better.
An emperor couldn’t just meet with a merrily without considering her as a possible mate, so I had seriously contemplated inviting Heather to dinner, tried to look at it from all angles. What it boiled down to though, was that I simply yearned to experience her marvelously soothing company again.
Deep down I feared I was already becoming addicted to the soothing influence she had on me. But I was also aware that considering Heather as a prospective empress was preposterous. Another human merrily in a place of power was unthinkable.
I didn’t begrudge Garth and Xandros having found their mekarries, but with them mated to humans, I could only imagine the outcry should I consider such an arrangement for myself.
And yet…
The Cryons would have an easy way out when I brought the empire’s accusations against them to the GTU after having been corrupted by the very humans they were suppressing. Me being one of them would weaken any of our arguments.
And yet…
None of my advisors would agree with me. They would argue that marrying outside our species without her bringing anything but trouble to the table would be a catastrophe.
