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“Wow,” she said as she looked at my hand against my breasts. “If I were a guy, I would drive all the way here just to see how you’re doing. Hell, I'm your friend, and I want to drive all the way here to check how you’re doing.”
At these completely nonsensical words, I gave her a look, and she burst out laughing.
“Stop moving around,” she said. “All the boys in this bar can't look away from your boobs. Hell, even I want to taste them.”
“Come on then,” I dared her. “Taste them.”
She narrowed her eyes at me, her entire being bubbling in amusement.
She looked around then and wisely only took a sip of her drink.
“You’re lucky,” she said. “I don’t want to start a stampede with all the boys here begging for their turn.”
She wasn't willing or able to be helpful, so I instead turned around and buried my head in my arms.
Groaning aloud, I wondered what I was going to do.
“First things first,” she said as though reading my mind. “You need to smell drunk, and so far you've been drinking cranberry vodka all night so that’s absolutely not going to do. What you need is actual liquor. Brandy, rum, tequila? Sammy?”
With a loud tap against the bar's surface, she called out to the friendly uniformed bartender, and he soon arrived before us.
“We need something that’ll make her smell like she's drunk within the next five minutes.”
“Oh?” he said, his eyes automatically going down to my boobs. I couldn't even be mad at this because by dressing this way, I had unquestionably been asking for this attention.
“Are you trying to entice someone?” Sammy asked. “Because you didn’t need any alcohol to do that, trust me.”
His eyes went down to my boobs once again, and I nearly rolled my eyes.
“I'm not trying to entice someone. I'm trying to save my ass.”
“Here?” she laughed. “Honey, the only way you can save your ass here is by leaving. The boys have left you alone so far because the game is on. It ends in twenty minutes. After then, you’re going to be devoured like a carcass.”
Now this made me absolutely terrified, so I turned to Mandy, who was wide-eyed and suspiciously drunk because she seemed to be having the time of her life at my expense.
“Will rum do it? What's the worst?”
“How about a combination, but still light enough for you? I mean, I'm assuming you don't want to get drunk, right?”
“I absolutely do not want to get drunk,” I replied, and he nodded.
“A Long Island iced tea it is.”
“Long Island,” Mandy nodded. “That’s not a bad choice. But drink it slowly, make sure it really becomes the taste of your mouth.”
“And how the heck am I supposed to do that?” I asked, returning my attention to my phone to check if he was pinging me something along the lines of if he was actually here. Or perhaps Mandy had heard him wrong, and he wasn’t actually coming. Truly, the last thing I wanted was for him to come to try to find me but at the thought that he might not come, I couldn't help but be disappointed as well.
“I still can’t believe I'm seeing the day,” Mandy said as she watched me fidget with my phone and put it away.
“What day?” I snapped, destabilized and anxious all in one.
“The day where you actually like someone. You've had such high standards, or at some point, I was sure you’d just completely lose interest in men altogether, but here we are. I am actually getting to witness you have the hots for your multi-millionaire lawyer boss, and I am enjoying every second of it.”
“Billionaire,” I corrected.
“What?” she asked in disbelief.
“He's a billionaire, not a millionaire.”
