AllFreeNovel
Share Us
My fingers curled in as he held my hand near his chest. “The right way?”
When his eyes reopened, a slight pink flush stained his cheeks. “The right way. You know. Us not being just all about sex.”
My lips parted, but I didn’t say anything. I was stunned by the fact Jase was blushing and from what he’d said.
The hue in his cheeks deepened. “As hard as it is to go slow with this, because damn, baby, I want you in every way imaginable.” He lowered my hand and pressed his erection against my palm, proving his next words. “I want you so badly right now it’s killing me, but every girl I’ve been with since . . . since a really long time has only ever been about sex. Getting in. Getting off. Then getting out.”
“Like Steph?” I blurted out before I could stop myself.
He cringed. “Yeah, like Steph. And that was okay with her—with them. Because as much as a dick as this makes me sound like, I didn’t care about them. Not like I care about you, Tess. I want this—I want us to be different. I want us to mean more than sex. I need us to mean more than that. Okay?”
As I stared at him, a knot climbed up and got lodged in my throat. Tears filled my eyes.
His pupils dilated as he dropped my hand and cupped my cheeks. “Baby, why are you about to cry? Did I—”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” I said quickly, my voice cracking. “You did everything perfectly.”
Confusion marked his expression. “I don’t understand.”
I laughed hoarsely. “It’s okay.” Leaning over, I kissed him. Whoever Jack’s mom was, was truly missing out. “It’s perfect.”
“You sure? Fuck what I think is right and wrong. Because I can get naked in like two seconds flat and be inside you quicker than that.”
I nodded and laughed again.
Jase rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. His warm breath danced over my lips. “I want to take you out on a date. I want to take you horseback riding. I want to tell your brother. I want to take you home to my parents and introduce you as my girlfriend. I want to prove this means more to me. I want to do this the right way.”
My chest squeezed under the pressure of what I felt for him in that moment. If I hadn’t already tumbled head over heels in love with him, I would’ve tonight, but I was already lost in him. Those three little words formed on my tongue, but I kept them to myself as I snuggled closer, closed my eyes, and allowed myself to just enjoy his closeness and his almost desperate want to do this the right way.
In spite of all the stuff running through my head, I slept like the dead after Jase left, waking up oddly refreshed. I’d thought Wednesday morning would be hard to face, waking up to a future I hadn’t planned, but if anything, what I really felt was an odd sense of anticipation.
As I got ready for classes, I received a text from Jase. He wouldn’t be in music but would be there to pick me up afterward. When I asked if everything was okay, he’d replied with a quick text saying everything was cool.
Excitement was palpable in the halls of Whitehall. Somehow I’d forgotten that we didn’t have classes Thursday or Friday. Fall break—a four-day weekend. History wasn’t nearly as crowded, but maneuvering with crutches was still damn inconveniencing.
Sympathy clouded Calla’s face when she got an eyeful of me and my crutches. “What happened?”
As I sat awkwardly in the chair, I told her I’d lost my balance on Sunday. I didn’t mention anything about Erik or Debbie. Not because I cared what people thought about the asshole, but I didn’t want Debbie to have to deal with it. Somewhere between yesterday morning and today, I decided Deb and I were going to have a nice long chat the next time she was in the dorm. I was going to tell her the truth—of what happened to me. It might not make a difference, but maybe it would.
“What about dancing?” Calla asked, and I winced.
“My knee is too unstable and it will most likely stay that way.” My stomach dipped at those words, as if saying them made it somehow more real. “It shouldn’t have given out on me Sunday, so . . .”
She leaned forward, lowering her voice. “So no dancing?”
Unable to say those words, I shook my head.
Her face fell. “I’m so sorry.”
“Thanks,” I croaked out.
I wasn’t very talkative after that. The whole “refreshed” mood evaporated when we missed the bus to west campus and I had to hoof it over. My armpits were killing me by the time we hit the arts center, and they still ached when I hobbled out at the end of class.
God knows how long I had to worry with these crutches. My lips slipped into a scowl as I tried to balance myself and pull down the back of my shirt. It would be so much easier if I didn’t have classes on both sides of the campus. I could drop music. Or if I dropped history, then I only had to go from my dorm to music then to east campus—
I cut those thoughts off. Dropping classes was like quitting. Giving up. I would not do that. No matter how much of a pain in my ass this would become.
“There’s your man,” Calla said, causing me to almost topple over as I stood on the pavilion.
