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My lips twitched. “I was saying okay, I’ll go to the party.”
“Smart choice. It’ll be fun and you’ll have a good time.” Once I was apparently sitting to his approval, he sat back. “When do you want me to pick you up?”
I shook my head. “I’m going to drive myself.”
“Why would you do that? We live in the same building and are heading to the same place.”
“Thanks, but I’ll drive.”
He studied me a moment. “If you don’t want to go with me, then at least get a ride with Brittany.”
I said something along the lines of agreeing to that, but I wasn’t planning on that. Taking my own car meant I could leave whenever I wanted to. I needed that lifeline.
“Hey,” Cam said.
Turning my head toward him, I raised my brows. “Hi.”
“Go out with me.”
I smiled. “Shut up, Cam.”
#
I was so nervous that my phone felt slippery in my hand and my seatbelt felt like it was pressed too tightly against my chest. I was sitting in the parking lot, thirty minutes past the time I should’ve left for the Halloween party at Jase’s house. I’d like to say that I was just being fashionably late, but that was so not the truth.
I was like two steps from a panic attack.
“So, you didn’t get a costume?” Brit said, and over her voice, I could hear music and muffled laughter. “It’s not a big deal. There are lots of people here that aren’t dressed up.”
Well, there went that excuse. After talking to Cam last night, I’d briefly considered the idea of making a last minute run to the store to find a costume, but dressing up would probably be too much.
“Are you almost here?” Brit asked. “Because I’m lonely—hey!”
A second later, Jacob’s voice came through the phone. “Hey, girl, hey, where you at?”
I closed my eyes. “I’m getting ready to leave.”
“You better, because Brit is getting on my nerves asking for you. So get your ass here.”
“I’m coming. I’ll be there in a little bit.”
Hanging up, I tossed the phone onto the seat next to me and gripped the steering wheel. I can do this. That’s what I kept telling myself as I glanced back up at my apartment. I’d left a light on and it was like a damn beacon right now, coaxing me back to the safety that was pure boredom.
I was being stupid, totally understood that, but it didn’t change the fact that my heart was thundering in my chest or that I was nauseous. What I was experiencing wasn’t normal to anyone else, and that was the key. I didn’t want this to be normal for me.
“Fuck.”
I needed to be brave.
I knocked the car into reverse and backed out. My arms were trembling by the time I made it to the end of the road and made the left onto Route 45. Jase’s house wasn’t that far from University Heights. Only a few miles, back in a nearby subdivision where several larger frats had taken up residency.
On the drive to his house, I focused on listing as many constellations I could. Andromeda, Antlia, Apus, Aquarius, Aquila, Ara, Aries, Auriga—who came up with these names? Seriously. I’d made it to the D’s when I spotted the line of cars pouring out of a large three-story home’s driveway. Cars were everywhere, parking along the road, in the yard, and down the street. I had to end up turning around so I could park on the other side of the street, about a block down.
The night air was chilly and the streets were void of children. Trick or treat had ended about an hour before and there were pieces of dropped candy every few feet.
Bright light spilled out from the windows, casting a luminous glow along the porch. There were a few people outside, leaning against the railing. Shoving my hands into the pockets of my hoodie, I avoided the garage, where a mean game of beer pong was going down, and through the open front door.
Holy crap…
