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I almost collapsed onto the bed, catching myself at the last minute and still dropping, but to the floor, curled onto my knees so my ass didn't hit. My breath came unevenly. Unwillingly, I looked at Lettie, searching to see anything that might be lying. That she was making it up to hurt me. That she was putting herself in a position of power.
There was nothing. Her big dark eyes met mine, full of compassion, fear and sorrow.
There was a panic filled creature inside me, scrabbling in terror, seeking exit somehow and somewhere. My eyes darted around the room, looking for somewhere to hide, somewhere impossible the guards wouldn't find me and drag me unprepared, not dressed or made up, down to face the madman who this time might kill me for such an offense.
If Lettie hit me, she'd have to do it hard enough to please him or he wouldn't accept it. He'd make her keep doing it. He'd have the guards do it, beating me until they fell and the next took their place.
He'd do it himself.
Or maybe it would be only a dozen cane strokes from Lettie. All of them over the new brand.
No matter what, I couldn't.
I became aware she was babbling in a panic almost matching mine. "Erin, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have told you, I'm so, so sorry, I thought it was better you were prepared, I can try to avoid hitting too hard but – oh, god, Erin, maybe he won't ask it. Maybe it's just going to be him watching one of us play with ourselves while he tries to fuck the other, god, that's only, the motherfucker, I want to kill him."
She was too loud. She was too loud and the guards were in the next room and I thought that probably we had up to about 30 minutes to prepare because what did they know about how long assignations with maniacs took to dress for? But on the other hand, they wouldn't wait forever. Likely they were as scared of the old asshole as we were and good, I hoped their days were vile, I hoped they rotted in their beds at night, dreading their upcoming shifts.
In the meantime I did the fastest thing I could think of to stop Lettie. I put my arms around her in a hug and when that didn't work, I kissed her.
Her mouth was warm and soft and surprised, if a mouth can be surprised, and then before I pulled away, she kissed me back, her tongue briefly on my lips, mine reaching out to touch hers. We looked at each other, equally surprised, then laughed, surprised at that, and then said at the same time, "We'll figure it out."
I dressed first, determined to have that out of the way if the guards became impatient and dragged us down before we were ready. Not that the make up wasn't extreme enough that Bevington would easily notice if it was missing. Just that the schoolgirl costume was impossible to miss.
Lacy black bra. Matching crotchless panties. I'd always thought those things were disgusting. Garter belt running under the panties, hooking to stockings, and thick socks I didn't want in the warmth of the night pulled up to my knees. No shoes. Wouldn't want to endanger those old balls with something hard that could kick.
I supposed I should be grateful we weren't wearing stilettos with the outfits.
White short sleeve button down, with the stupid little half bowtie, and the skirt, a travesty made possible by catholic schools everywhere. Dressed, I put my hair in pigtails, thinking I looked more ridiculous every second.
I'd have to bend over the vanity to put on my makeup. No way was I sitting. Even bending hurt, pulling the skin taught. The panties were pulled up like a thong. If there'd been another thong packed I'd have worn that.
The makeup kit was several different products. Evie had told me the most important if It was short on time was the eye shadow, followed by the lipstick. Followed by everything else. I reached for the absurdly huge case of eye make up and opened it to the large colorful powder discs.
One of them was sitting crooked.
Nothing in me thought that was a mistake.
Lettie was finishing putting on her clothes, not looking at me. I knew I'd gone tense, and she was observant, but I continued moving. If she looked up, she'd see me reflected in the mirror. But I wanted to know what I was dealing with before I shared anything. I trusted her as much as I could under the circumstances. She'd helped me, several times.
But pain can turn people on each other and Bevington knew how to cause pain.
The blue eyeshadow cup popped the rest of the way out of the case and into my hand. The entire case was hollow, a weirdly wasted space making the buyer think they were getting more makeup than they actually were. The eyeshadow discs snapped into place, a series of twenty-four colors, three rows across, eight discs in each row.
Under the makeup, a knife had been slipped in, thin enough to fit through the two inch disc of powered shadow. The blade was about six inches long, not even an inch wide, and the handle very short. It was a nasty blade, meant to be held close and used at close range.
It didn't seem remotely possible Evie had put it there. She'd warned me the best way to stay safe as I could – which wasn't much – was to go along. She'd caned me with full force so Raven could see what I could endure.
That was almost laugh worthy at this point. Yeah, Evie, you have no idea.
Most likely the blade had come from Theo. Nothing he'd done had been quite right. He was slow to chase me and didn't retaliate when dropped by a car door to the balls.
"Problem?" Lettie asked. She'd noticed I'd stopped moving.
"Which one would you like me to expound on first?" I asked in an even voice.
She made a wordless sound of agreement and headed into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.
Which gave me time to search through the kit. I slipped the knife into my garter straps along the top of my thigh, wondering how long until that was discovered, and did a little jig to see if it would stay in place and, if so, if it would draw my blood before I had a chance to use it on anyone else. It did stay in place and it didn't cut me and I could hear Lettie moving around so I sped up, checking into the case, shaking it upside down.
