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“But you couldn't tell him the truth, obviously, or he would have bailed. So you just went along, knowing eventually this exact thing would happen?”
I shrug, unwilling to claim the stupid plan as my own, but unable to deny the truth of it.
“That’s kinda fucked up. But I get it.”
I look at him then, really look for the first time since he came into the room. It’s only been a couple of months since I saw him last, but he looks so different. His hair is shorter and more kempt. His skin has a deep, golden tan with a sunburn across his nose.
What strikes me more than anything, though, is how young he looks. So very, very young.
Young and stupid.
Just like me.
“Well, it’s over now,” I say, resigned to my fate.
“I don’t think so,” Ainsley replies in his familiar dismissive tone.
“What do you mean? I lied to the guy for months about something really important. He just got on a plane to fly halfway around the globe instead of saying goodbye. That sounds pretty over to me.”
“I mean, it’s over if you want it to be, sure. But he’s a changed man. I’ve been seeing signs of it for weeks. It's why I came back, really. I was worried he was dying of cancer or something.”
I wait, unable to breathe. Ainsley flashes me an evil smile. He knows just what his words are doing to me.
Finally, he pulls his phone from his pocket. “Check out this text convo.”
I wait while he scrolls for what seems like forever.
“So, this is from him back in September, this would have been right about the time we were preparing to leave Indonesia.
You haven’t answered my texts so I’m assuming that means you don’t need a phone anymore. Maybe I should cut off service and save myself the expense.
Ainsley laughs and scrolls again. “Here’s one of my personal favorites.”
Ainsley Adams, I don’t know where you are, but I do know that you failed once again to show up for the new semester. I paid a fortune for that seat and you wasted it. You could have fed a whole village of hungry children with the money you just wasted on whatever fucking off you’re doing now. COME HOME.
“So, anyway, that’s how it’s gone for the last year since I bailed on Harvard and started traveling the world.”
“What do you reply to these?” I ask.
“Oh, I just say I love you or Merry Christmas or something snarky like that. It doesn’t really matter what I say. The only thing that would satisfy him is to do what he says.” He turns back to his phone and starts scrolling once more. “Or, that’s how it used to be. Look at this text I got a few weeks ago.” He holds the phone out for me to take.
I got to see the most amazing sunset from Merit last night. The incoming storm clouds lit up with gold and pink. It reminded me of that trip we took to MOMA back in your freshman year. You remember those paintings? I guess they’re probably back in Rome now. Maybe we can go see them there sometime.
I look up from the screen and narrow my eyes at him.
“Keep scrolling.”
So I do.
Yeah, dad, that sounds fun. We should definitely do that.
Still on Merit, can you believe that? Enjoying what might be my first real vacation. Hope you’re having fun.
Did you know that the little island off the east coast of Merit is actually a coral formation? It has hundreds of tunnels and caves that divers explore. I’ve never thought about getting certified before, but it’s a possibility for next season.
Have you ever been to Katy’s Crab Shack in Saubry? I just had the best dinner of my life. Ate the whole thing with my hands but it was worth it.
Ave told me he found you doing some work for people who need help with rising water. I’m still a little disappointed that you aren’t here, but I’m proud of you for helping.
