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There’s a cabinet full of expensive bath oils, lotions, and washes, all in a variety of feminine fragrances. In movies and books, they always talk about women having a distinctive scent, but I always bought what was on offer, regardless of what it smelled like. Opening each bottle in turn, I smell them, settling on the bottle that’s described as gardenia.
I’ve never smelled a gardenia in real life, but if the flowers really do smell like this oil, then they must be good. Drizzling some of the oil into the stream of water, I watch the steam rise, filling the room with the delicious scent.
Stripping out of my bikini that’s been on and off so many times today it’s absurd, I step into the tub, sinking down into the warm water and exhaling a ragged breath. My ass is still tender, but apart from the skin being a little red, there’s no real evidence of the spanking I took earlier.
Vik’s belt hurt like a bitch when he was striking me with it, but the licks haven’t left any welts or marks. I feel wrung out, dog tired, and mentally exhausted. I’m still trying to process all the information they’ve given me in a very short space of time, and honestly my mind is on overload.
Growing up as the daughter of a whore, I thought I had a pretty tight grip on my moral compass. I don’t approve of the way my mom kept a roof over our heads, but it’s the oldest profession in the world and she worked hard—albeit, on her back.
But I knew from a very young age that I wouldn’t be following in her footsteps. I’d rather struggle to survive than ever sell myself. I thought I understood the line between good and bad, and right and wrong.
Only, a man died this morning and I don’t feel as affected by it as I should be. These men confessed to murdering the man who provided the other half of my DNA and I didn’t really blink at the knowledge that they were the reason he was dead. And I applauded them when they told me that Orlov will die for his sins and all the women he’s hurt, including Viktor’s sister.
If my moral compass was pointing as strictly north as I thought, surely, I’d be horrified and disgusted by sleeping with murderers? But I’m not horrified. I’ve slept like a baby, safely tucked between these dangerous, brutal men.
What does that say about me?
Even now, while I’m trying to reflect on how I’m feeling and process everything that’s happened, I’m thinking about them. A part of me wishes Vik was sharing the tub with me, that Dimi was spoiling me with attentive touches and the kind of caregiving I’ve never experienced before, and that Lev was waiting to wrap me in a towel, then dress me in whatever he picks out for me.
How can I possibly be enjoying my captivity?
Closing my eyes, I lean my head back against the side of the tub and breathe in the sweet floral scent emanating from the water. Trying to quiet my whirring mind, I attempt to meditate, but every time I try to clear my thoughts, my villains fill my mind instead.
Rustling grabs my attention and I open my eyes just as Dimi slides his shorts down his hips revealing his rapidly hardening cock.
“I wasn’t expecting you to be awake,” he says, stepping free of his shorts, completely unashamed of his nakedness.
“I only woke up a few minutes ago,” I admit.
Nodding, he gestures for me to slide forward, then climbs into the tub, settling into the water behind me.
“Are you feeling better?” he asks, wrapping his arms around me from behind, and pulling my back against his chest.
“I don’t know,” I confess.
“Are you angry that Viktor punished you?”
“A little, but probably not as much as I should be.”
“Why should you be angry?” he asks, sounding confused.
“Being spanked and hit with a belt while I have ginger burn from the inside out seems like something that should upset me.”
His chuckle is soft. “Perhaps to others it might be something objectionable. But not to you. I doubt you’ll admit it, but you enjoy the boundaries and consequences we’ve laid out for you. If I were to guess, I’d assume your mother wasn’t the type of parent who cared much about rules.”
It’s my turn to laugh and I shake my head. “No. Even when I was very young, I took care of her, not the other way around. She was a junkie whore, but when she remembered I was there, she was actually a surprisingly good mom. Unfortunately, she liked the oblivion of being high more than she liked living in the present. And you’re right. I don’t enjoy being in pain, but having most of my choices taken from me has been oddly freeing. It’s made this fucked-up situation a little easier for me to deal with.”
“I can see how you’d feel that way,” he says, scooping handfuls of water and letting them pour onto my chest to keep me warm. “Are you upset about the guard?”
“I don’t even know his name.”
“His name isn’t important, Malishka. Everyone in life has rules they have to abide by. For most people, that’s the law of the country they live in. This island isn’t governed by the usual laws and consequences, but that doesn’t mean it’s lawless. We set the rules here. Vik, Lev, and I are judge, jury and executioner. The guard broke the rules and the consequences were steep.” His voice is so calm, so rational, even when he’s talking about cold blooded murder.
“Did he have a family? Will anyone come looking for him?”
“Ailing parents and a younger brother. He was on the run from the military police, but we’ll make sure that his family knows that he’s dead and provide them with a death-in-service package,” he states almost robotically.
“Does that make it okay? Letting his parents know their son is dead and sending them some money to make up for it?” I ask, my tone harsh even to my own ears.
