AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"My money certainly was a key reason you decided to marry me." I watch her keenly, waiting to see what she’ll say next.
She swallows; some of the anger on her face dissipates. "I needed the money when we met. But it’s not the only reason I married you, and you know that.”
Don’t say it. Not now. I don’t want to know if you have feelings for me. Don’t make this more difficult than it already is. Give me a way out. Tell me you hate me for fucking you the way I did. Tell me you can’t wait to get away from me. Tell me, before I’m forced to break your heart, because I’ll never be able to forgive myself if I do.
I shutter my features and pretend to have a polite interest. “Do I?” I ask in a toneless voice.
"I thought"—she swallows—"I thought you cared for me. I thought you wanted more. I thought you said we had something special. That even though you felt terrible about hurting Felix, nothing could stop you from marrying me. That you wanted a future together."
My heart stutters. She’s right on all these accounts but I can’t admit that to her. Instead, I ensure my expression remains stony. “It’s true I wanted to get Felix on board before we married. And I have you to thank for making that happen. As for the rest, you thought wrong. The only reason I married you was to ensure my role as CEO within the Davenport group is confirmed."
And because I love you and need you in my life, but I don’t dare tell you that.
She draws in a sharp breath. "How can you say that? How can you pretend whatever happened between us doesn’t matter when I know it did. I’ve seen that look in your eyes when you’re inside me. I’ve seen you watch me when we’re in a room together. You can’t take your gaze off me.”
I raise my shoulder. “What can I say? I’m a good actor. I needed to convince my family our connection was genuine. Seems I also convinced you in the process.”
“I don’t believe you." She shakes her head. "I don’t.”
My wife knows me too well. Fuck. Why is this so difficult? Why does it feel like I’ve aimed a gun at my temple and am about to pull a trigger?
I wall off the churning sensation in my guts and lift my chin. "It’s true. I saw you and wanted you. I went into this marriage thinking it could be more than an arrangement of convenience, but?—"
"But—?" She swallows.
"I realize now, I was fooling myself. I don’t want a relationship that will tie me down."
"You don’t?"
I set my jaw and inject scorn into my voice when I drawl. "Someone in my position, and with my life experience… You didn’t think you could satisfy all my needs, did you?"
The blood drains from her face.
She’s watching me closely, watching my mouth make the words like she has to confirm to herself it’s me who's doing the talking. I’m sorry, baby. So sorry. But it’s for the best.
"You… You don’t mean it," she chokes out. "The Quentin I know is not someone who’d walk all over my heart. Your gruff demeanor hides the more vulnerable parts of you." She takes a step forward. "That’s it, isn’t it? I make you feel a lot. You look at me and realize you can’t run from your emotions anymore. It makes you feel exposed and raw and emotionally naked. Well, guess what? Welcome to the land of the living."
A tension grips me. I grit my teeth so hard, my jaw muscles protest. What is she talking about? That makes no sense. I’m not scared of feeling, and I do feel emotions. Only, I had to lock them away so I could do my duty. And even there, you failed them. You couldn’t protect Ryot’s wife.
But I can protect Raven now. Because I love her, I can push her away. I can do this for her, so she gets the life she deserves. I draw on that coldness inside me which allowed me to make decisions on a mission.
"Nothing you say will make me change my mind.” I narrow my gaze on her.
She flinches.
"My mind is made up. Our relationship is one of mutual advantage. And I've done my part.” My voice emerges cold and hard, while my entire body shrinks from my words.
"What do you mean?" she cries.
"Your sister’s future is set. Your father has been accepted into the trial for the experimental treatment at Johns Hopkins."
“He has?” Her features light up.
And despite the fact I’ve locked away my emotions, a soft sensation seeps into my chest. Jesus, I love this woman.
All the more reason you need to distance yourself from her.
Her lips curve. "That could be potentially?—"
