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She’d been content with their lives. They’d had each other, Jackson and a baby on the way. That had been enough for her. But not for Peter, or so he’d said. He claimed to have done everything for her, which made her uncomfortable. She didn’t know if him saying that meant he was trying to explain his actions or if he was passing part of the blame onto her.
There weren’t any answers to her questions, no way to find out the truth. Tired of asking and not knowing, she went downstairs. Maybe she could walk off her restlessness.
It was nearly eleven and the house was quiet. Summer had long since gone to her room and Mara had been out with one of her male friends. Allison expected the family room to be dark, but several lights were on and she found Erica sitting by herself, a glass of wine on the coffee table.
In the second before the other woman noticed her, Allison had the thought that she looked sad and vulnerable. Two states of being that didn’t seem very Erica-like.
“You’re up late,” Erica said, reaching for her wine.
“I could say the same about you.”
“I’m dealing with life crap.”
“Me, too.” Allison sat on the sectional. “At least you get to distract yourself with liquor.”
“In a few weeks, you can, too.”
Allison shook her head. “I’m going to be breastfeeding, so no.”
Erica put down her wine. “Now I feel guilty.”
“Don’t. It’s not your fault. For Bethany, the sacrifice is worth it.”
“I would have said the same about Summer.” She eyed Allison. “Why aren’t you sleeping? Is it all about how far along you are or did something else happen?”
“There’s nothing new. Don’t worry, I’m not going to be asking for more money.” She grimaced. “Sorry. That came out more bitchy than I intended. It’s just...” She held in a sigh. “I can’t reconcile everything Peter did with the man I married. He told me he did it all for me. But I never wanted this and I was happy with what we had.”
She hesitated, not sure how much she could say, then told herself there was no point in having secrets from the one woman helping her.
“There was money. Some guy showed up and said he had money for me that Peter had asked him to hold. It was ten thousand dollars.”
Erica’s brows rose. “The money would have made you feel better but having someone show up to hand it to you? Disquieting at best.”
“He scared me.” Allison looked at her. “I didn’t tell you about it.”
“I know.”
“Aren’t you upset?”
“Not really. Your situation was desperate. You barely knew me and you didn’t trust me. Why would you share that?” She paused. “Oh, so that’s why you sold your ring. You already had part of the retainer. If you added in the five thousand I’d given you, plus the car, you might have made it.”
Her expression turned stern. “Forgive my French, but that’s a dumbass idea. You would have been left without a penny. I know you love your husband, but you have children to think about. You shouldn’t sacrifice yourself for him.”
“I know you’re right, but I’m not sure that’s how I feel. Everything about this is hard.” She felt her emotions slipping out of control and did her best to hang on. “You’ve told me you don’t want any more thanks, but I’m going to say it anyway. I’d be homeless if you hadn’t stepped in.”
Erica reached for her wine. “I’m glad I could help.” She paused. “Huh. I actually mean that.” She smiled briefly. “You’re my lone success these days. Well, you and work. But lately my interpersonal relationships keep taking hits.”
“What does that mean?”
Erica sipped from her glass. “Summer had a boyfriend last year and I didn’t know. She never said a word. She went through that entire experience without saying a word. She won’t even let me cut her hair. I can’t figure out if she genuinely doesn’t like me or if I’m the worst mother ever.”
Allison felt the other woman’s pain. “I’m sorry. That’s really hard.”
“Did you know?”
The question caught her off guard, which made her unsure of what to say. Unfortunately the silence was its own answer.
“You did.” Erica turned away. “I’m not even surprised.”
