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Fucking Christ.
Guerrero fucking shot her.
I didn't even think to make sure he didn't have another gun on him somewhere.
I drop to my knees beside her, shoving Carter out of the way to get to her. She's breathing, her chest rising and falling steadily. Fighting back a wave of terror-induced dizziness, I check her over with shaking hands.
There's a bullet hole in her right shoulder. It's clean, with an exit wound high up on her back beside her shoulder blade. My hands slip and slide across her damp skin as I run them over her, looking for any other damage and finding none.
"Call an ambulance," I order Carter, grabbing my cell from my pocket and tossing it in his direction.
Tahani drops to her knees across from me, tears streaming down her cheeks. She wraps her little arms around herself, her face paling as she stares down at her best friend. The sight tugs at my heart. I want to hug her and tell her that everything is going to be okay, but I don't have time to comfort her when Mila's still bleeding.
Christ, baby, don't bleed out on me. Please don't fucking bleed out on me.
"Hold her," I order my daughter, letting go of Mila long enough to rip my shirt off over my head. Once I've got it off, I tear it down the middle and bind it tightly across Mila's shoulder, trying to staunch the flow of blood. As soon as that's done, I pull her limp body out of Tahani's lap and back into my arms.
The rain picks up, falling faster. It's cool against my bare skin, but I don't give a fuck.
"I'm so sorry," I whisper over and over, my voice thick with unshed tears. I brush her hair back from her pale face and rain kisses across her cool skin.
She's so still in my arms.
If she doesn't wake up because of that motherfucker…if our baby dies because of him…
No. That's not going to happen. I won't fucking let that happen.
"The ambulance is on the way," Carter murmurs, dropping to the sand beside me. He hangs his head, his shoulders slumped. When he speaks, shame and guilt mingle in his voice. "I'm so fucking sorry, Gregory. I should have checked him for another gun. I shouldn't have taken my eyes off him."
I shouldn't have either. We both fucked up.
Jesus, why can't I ever seem to get it right with Mila?
She's the reason my fucking heart beats, but every move I make ends up with her hurt. The realization makes me feel so fucking small and helpless. All I've ever wanted to do is to protect her, to keep her safe and sweet and happy. Instead, I've failed her over and over, letting my world touch her again and again.
I don't deserve her.
Please, baby, forgive me for this.
Gritting my teeth in a desperate attempt to fight back the pain threatening to knock me over, I push myself to my feet, keeping Mila in my arms. I hold her carefully, trying to shelter her from the rain and keep pressure on her wound at the same time.
Tahani hops up beside me and reaches out to help. She hesitates, her hand trembling over the shirt tied tightly around Mila's shoulder. Her gaze meets mine, filled with uncertainty.
"Hold it tightly," I manage to grit out to her.
She nods once, her expression clearing. She bites her lip and then presses both hands to Mila's shoulder, applying pressure from both sides before she looks up at me again with a silent question in her eyes.
"Just like that," I tell her. She's been through hell today?has seen more of my world than I ever wanted her to see?but she's pushing through it the best she can for Mila. Sooner or later, she'll crack, but for now, she's holding it together for the woman in my arms. I'm so fucking proud of her.
As sirens wail in the distance, we stumble up the beach toward the parking lot. Carter stays behind to guard the crime scene. There are a few people gathered on the far side of the beach near the pier, staring at us. None try to approach us, though. Not that I blame them. Not after the bullshit that just went down out here. Not with two dead bodies lying in our wake.
By the time we make it to the stairs leading up to the parking lot, Santa Cruz officers and ambulances fill the parking lot. Blue lights and sirens rip through the air. Chaos erupts around us as two officers pound down the stairs toward us. They take one look at Mila and try to take her from my arms.
"I've got her," I snarl. I can't let her go. I fucking can't. As fucked up as it is, even now, I don't want anyone else's hands on her but mine. I got her into this shit. Some part of me desperately needs to be the one who gets her out of it. If I don't, I'm going to lose what little composure I have left.
One officer backs away without a word and then jogs down the beach toward Carter.
"Let me help, Gregory," the other mutters.
