AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Oh, you poor thing,” she clucks. She pulls on the chair across from mine and settles in it. She passes me several napkins from the dispenser and waits for me to blot my face.
When I’m done, she gives me a look filled with compassion. “Why don’t you tell me all about it?”
For the first time, I tell someone my whole story. I don’t leave out any of the embarrassing details like being born to a drug addicted mom or always being the kid that couldn’t find her forever home. I talk about reconnecting with my brother who doesn’t even like me.
Finally, I tell her about Ryan and how he’s sweet to me. How he’s felt like my first real friend since I came to Asheville. Then I tell her about the bathroom, but I leave out the sexy parts. I just tell her that he held me and comforted me.
When I’m done over an hour has passed. I feel drained from pouring my heart out but also lighter too. It’s nice to have someone simply listen to everything I say without judgement. Is that what it’s like to have a mom?
“So, about Ryan…tell me again why you left him.”
I wrap my arms around myself as if that will somehow help me hold the broken pieces of my heart together.
“He’ll make me leave,” I whisper. “If I tell him how I feel, he’ll send me away.”
“It’s easier to be the one that walks away first,” Norah summarizes. There’s no judgement in her warm brown gaze. Only understanding and empathy.
I nod, grateful that someone understands why I have to go.
I know that Eric didn’t get it, but he’s never understood me. We probably met too late in life to form any type of sibling bond. It’s another thought that makes me sad. I was so excited when I found him. I’d had this image of having a warm, close bond with someone.
Except I found that bond with Ryan.
“I felt the way you did once,” she says. Her eyes get a distant look in them. “I was overseas in Spain that year.”
“Did you love him?” I ask softly, curious about this woman who has taken time out of her night to comfort a stranger.
She smiles but there’s hurt on her face, too. She finally whispers, “I loved him, but I didn’t know how to say it. So I ran at the end of the summer. I have a good life now, but the memory of my Hugo haunts me. I’ll always wonder what could have been between us.”
“What if he would have left you?” I can’t help the question from bubbling up. As she was talking, I realized walking away from Ryan will always be the biggest regret of my life. No matter what I do or where I go, I’ll always miss him. My heart and body will belong to him as long as I’m breathing.
She gives me a pitying look. “Judging from the way he was looking at you tonight, I’d say you probably broke his heart.”
“I broke his heart,” I whisper the words as the breath leaves my lungs in a whoosh. I broke Ryan’s heart. Sadness surges through me. He’s only ever been good and kind toward me and I ran from him.
“Love is not something to run from, Lacey.” She gives me a patient smile. “It’s something to run to.”
The words fill me with hope. Maybe love isn’t something to fear. Maybe it’s something to cling to. “Do you think he would take me back?”
“I’m sure he’d be willing to hear you out,” she offers.
It’s enough to get me on my feet. “Thank you for this.”
“Thank me by showing up for classes in the fall,” she answers. “You have talent, and you are so very loved. It’s time to stop running.”
I stare at her for a moment, trying to decide if she’s teasing me. There’s only sincerity and kindness on her face.
Finally, I nod. I’ll register on Monday morning. But first, there’s a soldier I have to find.
I’m still trying to shrug into my backpack as I step outside, bumping into someone. Instantly, strong arms go around my hips to steady me.
I know from the way the air around me electrifies that it’s Ryan. “You found me,” I say. Even after I ran, he was still looking for me.
“Do you have any idea how many independent bookstores there are in Asheville?” He asks me. “I’ve been to four of them looking for a woman with purple hair.”
I stare up into his face underneath the streetlight. “Why?” My heart is pounding, and my stomach is fluttering.
“Because I love you and I want you by my side.” His chest heaves, and he has the same intense look of concentration on his face as he did in the bathroom. “And if you have to run every day for the rest of your life, that’s OK. Because you have someone that’s willing to run with you.”
