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“This can’t be happening.”
“And you’re not my first choice either, but I think I’ll quite like being married to you, Matthew Morris.”
“Fuck off,” I say and shove at his chest.
He falls back against the pillows with a half laugh, half groan.
“We’re getting this annulled or a divorce.”
Coop peers up at me and his lips twitch. “We’ll see about that.”
My eyes narrow, but before I can respond, the door bursts open and I see Sem stride in. He’s wearing a thin, raggedy t-shirt and worn jeans, his dirty blond hair pulled back in a half ponytail.
“What the hell are you doing in here? How do you have a key?” I ask as his blue eyes swivel down to my lap.
“Better question is why are you both naked?” he asks, his lips turning up into a small smile as he leans against the wall and crosses his arms. “But I don’t think you need to answer that. Assholes are the best. Really tight.”
“Oh my god,” I groan as I throw a sheet over me. “That’s not?—”
“Don’t need your excuses, man. Maggie was worried you were dead, even though I don’t think you deserve any of that, so I came to check on you. It seems you’re not dead, but someone’s hole got murdered, huh? Whose was it?”
Coop sputters a laugh while my face goes molten.
“No one had sex. I don’t know what happened.”
“Well, you’re one to talk. My ass is a little sore,” Coop replies, grinning at Sem. “Matt must not have that big of a dick to totally wreck it.”
I glower at him, pulling a pillow into my lap, and then glance back at Sem. “My dick is perfectly fine.”
“Hmm,” Coop says with a sassy grin, and I want to smother him with the pillow. “Doubtful.”
“We are not—we aren’t talking about this! Go tell Magnus we’re fine.”
“Will do,” Sem says, making no move to leave. His eyes are settled on my chest. “Got some cum there.”
He points to my pec, and I fling the pillow at him but it misses by a few feet.
“I know,” I grumble.
“Yours or his?”
“Fuck you.”
“No thanks. Got Maggie for that.”
I close my eyes and breathe through my nose.
“Go away, Sem. I swear to god.”
He chuckles lowly and pushes away from the wall. “Alright, but meet us for lunch. Maggie’ll send you the location. And you might want to wash that mess off you first, unless you’re into that kind of thing, carrying your man’s cum all over your skin.”
“Oh, fuck no,” I murmur just as Coop chimes in.
“Sure thing. My husband and I will be there.”
I shoot him a death glare for sharing that little nugget with Sem. If only my eyeballs could incinerate someone, Coop would be a heap of ash on the floor.
Sem grins widely, and a laugh escapes him. “Maggie is gonna love this.”
