I glance at his hands, and for a moment think about how much I like those appendages on me before pushing that thought away. That’s not where my mind needs to go today. Not at all. It’s bad enough what I’ve allowed to happen already.
“Sure you do, and no, jocks didn’t jerk it in the public showers with each other.”
“Well, that’s a tragedy.”
“For you maybe.”
“Yes, definitely for me. I have visions of walking into a locker room and there’s cum everywhere. Just fountains of it.”
I shiver at the thought of it. “Yeah, no thanks.”
“You have yet to live, Matthew, until you’ve been covered in cum.” He glances at me and then shakes his head, adding, “But wait, you have been. You just can’t remember it.”
I grin at him and he smiles back. My heart flutters in my chest once more, and I wonder for a moment if I have some kind of arrhythmia. I should probably make a doctor’s appointment to get it checked out. I’d hate to die young.
“Do you really not remember it?” he asks quietly. “Nothing?”
“Yeah, nothing. Just vague impressions, but nothing more.”
“Hm, tragic. Hopefully it comes back soon. I want to remember.”
I’m not sure I do, but I don’t say that, and I’m saved from having to because Coop rubs his stomach once more and stands up.
“Alright, so let me grab the cookies and we can go.”
I move to grab him, but he just arches an eyebrow at me, daring me to stop him. I recoil back slightly. Yeah, I won’t be messing with Coop and his cookies. He looked like he was ready to bite my fingers off. And I really need those. For very important purposes.
We end up back in his car, him happily munching on cookies he most definitely shouldn’t be eating.
“Oh god, I’m stuffed but these are so good.”
“Let me know if you need me to pull over so you can take a giant dump on the side of the freeway.”
He gasps, the cookie perched daintily between his fingers. “Matthew! I would never.”
“You’ll have to use twigs to wipe your butt. There’s no toilet paper.”
“You are a heathen.”
“It’s the truth. That much went in. That much is going to have to come out.”
He shakes his head. “I never poop and I never fart. You’ll learn this about me.”
“Fucking liar.”
He laughs at that and then resumes eating, choosing to ignore my perfectly logical comment. Fine by me. This guy is delusional. Who the fuck says they don’t poop?
Coop, that’s who.
When we finally make it back to my place, I’m loath to even get out of the car. His hand has been on me the rest of the way home, and I don’t want to leave.
“So remember, hubby. Movers come this Friday,” he reminds me, and I roll my eyes as I push the car door open. Even now, my feet refuse to carry me upstairs.
“I’ll barricade the door,” I lie.
“No, you won’t. You’re secretly looking forward to this.”
I shake my head at how confident he is as I step out into the cool air. Coop rounds the car, pulling my things from the trunk. And without asking permission, pulls me in for a long hug. His head rests on my shoulder and my hands slip up his back. I should not be doing this in public where anyone could see, and yet here I am.