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I’m not gay. This marriage was a mistake.
“I do love this,” Magnus says with an evil grin. “I mean, this is just so damn perfect. Matt married to a man. Who would have ever thought?”
“Shut up,” I grumble, even though I know I deserve it. After all the shit I pulled with him and Max, this is karma coming back to bite me in the ass.
“Don’t tell him to shut up,” Sem grunts, and I meet his angry gaze.
“Sorry. Fuck, I’m just… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
The first part of making amends to those you’ve hurt is admitting your wrongdoing. And I’ve done a lot of wrong things. The way I treated my youngest brother, for starters. His whole life, he felt like he couldn’t be himself, and then when he finally admitted it, I said some ugly, hateful things. And then I did the same thing with Max when I met Beau. Maybe I should get my jaw wired shut to keep that shit inside.
“You shouldn’t have, but I can’t expect you to change overnight,” Magnus says, giving me more kindness than I deserve. The fact that he’s here at lunch, sitting near me is amazing. And I can’t believe that Max invited me to his impromptu wedding.
I don’t deserve either of them. I know this. I need to be more careful about what I say and do.
“Yeah, I know, but I’ll try harder to watch what I say.”
Magnus nods, happy with my apology and owning my mistake. Although Sem did say something about actions speaking louder than words. I do need to up my game. I need to prove I’m a better man.
Peering up at my older brother Max, I see him nod at me. My chest swells at his acknowledgment of me. I did good. For once, I made the right decision.
“I guess this is karma,” I mutter, and Coop rolls his eyes.
“I mean, anyone would be lucky to be married to me. It’s looking up, Matthew.”
I peek over at him, and he winks at me. Maybe if I were gay, I’d like being married to him. I mean, he’s not bad-looking, he has this loud confidence I certainly don’t possess, and he has money.
If we made this work, I’d never have to worry about anything for the rest of my life. He’d take care of me. I could actually work for the enjoyment of it and not stress about bills. I could have someone to come home to and cuddle with. Maybe he wouldn’t make fun of me for needing it so badly. Seems to me like gay people are more accepting of other people’s differences and are slower to ridicule.
“Here’s your food,” the waitress says, balancing a large serving tray in her hand. I don’t know how she manages it, but she does it effortlessly.
She sets down an inordinate amount of food in front of Sem who leans over and starts devouring it like a barbarian. It’s impressive, really. Magnus doesn’t seem bothered by it in the least, just places his napkin on his lap and starts to cut up his food with deft precision.
“I’m telling you. Eating without hungry kids looming is like a dream. I can actually take my time. Sem, you can slow down.”
Sem hesitates a moment, his cheeks bulging from the pancakes stuffed in there. He looks like a large, unkempt squirrel. He swallows and nods, probably realizing what he looks like.
“Sorry,” he murmurs, and Magnus leans up and presses a kiss to his cheek, making Sem blush.
Such a fucking weird thing to see, but then again, nothing is normal anymore.
What is normal anyways?
“Nothing to be sorry for, baby,” Magnus says, and Sem’s cheeks darken even more. “Love it when you stuff your mouth full. Shows me how much can fit in there.”
He grins at his husband and Sem grins back.
“Jesus,” I murmur as I take a bite of my sausage.
Breakfast food was the wrong thing to order because Coop leans over and whispers that he loves seeing a sausage in my mouth.
I glower at him, and he chuckles at how perturbed I am.
“Too bad we can’t remember if you had my sausage in your mouth.”
“For fuck’s sake,” I reply and then swallow the meat quickly, choking on it and making Coop smile even wider.
“A little deep-throat action with that meat,” he adds with a waggle of his eyebrows.
