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“What do they do?”
His chest shakes with silent laughter, and I can’t help the pride that washes over me at making the cold prince laugh. But when he speaks, his voice is rough, “they prevent you from speaking lies” —he sighs— “and influence you to act out your… truest desires.”
“Oh.” This will be awkward tomorrow. “Why are they in the pantry…just sitting there?”
“For Ostara. It’s coming up soon.”
“Ostara?” I mutter.
I must doze off in his arms, because next thing I know, he’s tucking me into silky sheets. My eyelids are practically glued shut with sleep, my mouth dry.
“Will you stay with me?” I mumble.
There’s a pause, as if he’s contemplating an answer. “No,” Rainer says softly. “Not like this.”
“Why not?”
“Because I can’t.”
“Can’t or won’t?”
“Both.”
“You just said it yourself,” I murmur, my eyes finally peeling open. “You’re not with Fern. And the berries only bring out true desires. I want this, Rai Rai. I want something good. Something pure and pleasurable.”
“I am the antithesis of good or pure, Alessia.”
“Then I want bad. Tainted. Wicked. I want you.”
His jaw tenses and he turns away from me, so I shut my eyes again. “I can’t give you that. But I can give you a single truth: I don’t want to hurt you” —he sighs— “and I will. It’s inevitable.”
Hurt me? How could he possibly hurt me?
Sleep begins to pull me back under, and I ask for one more thing before it takes me: “Can you remove the stupid magical barrier?” I mutter. “I’m sick of running into it.”
“My silly little rose,” he whispers, “I’ve considered your debt paid for quite some time now.”
Soft lips brush my forehead, before his boots thump across the floor. The door creaks open before closing with a click.
I’m hit with a realization then: I’ve been able to move freely about the castle. I stepped foot outside the walls when the shadow called to me the other night.
There haven’t been any barriers to stop me.
I haven’t even noticed, but I’ve been free.
eighteen
Now I Have to See My Nemesis
Rainer
Lying to myself about hating Alessia isn’t working anymore. I’m drawn to her inexplicably and dangerously. And she’s starting to notice. Worse, she said she wants me.
Me.
And it was the whole, honest truth because it’s impossible to lie while high on moonberries. Gods help me, I almost lost control. It’s no small miracle that I was able to walk away from her and leave her untouched in that bed.
My veins sizzle beneath my skin, and burning desire propels me through the castle.
