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Whatever she’s doing, it doesn’t seem malicious. There’s no taunting in her features.
“This isn’t… what I…meant,” I spit out in between heavy breaths. I plop down onto the grass as Ken accepts his sword back from Viv and sheaths it. He gives me a consolatory pat on the shoulder with his meaty paw.
“You did better than I expected,” Viv says.
“I did absolutely nothing!” The frustration is apparent in my voice, and I take a few more breaths to rein it in. “You and Rainer are right,” I say to Ken. “I am pathetic.”
“Hey, there’s no self-pity allowed in sword fighting,” Ken says sternly. “Viv is only making a point. She’s testing your tenacity.”
“Sword fighting isn’t as easy as it looks,” she adds. “It’s not just a battle—it’s an art. The blade isn’t only a weapon either. It’s a tool that’s meant to be respected. You have to learn to understand and respect your own body—your own tool—before you can add anything into the mix.”
I chew on my bottom lip, not responding immediately. She has a point. Even holding the darned thing was hard for me. Just because they make it look easy, doesn’t mean it is.
“How do I learn to do that?”
“With these.” She holds up her hands, wiggling her fingers. “Listen, if you meet me and Ken down here at dawn daily, we’ll teach you how to work with your body and find your own grace.”
“Will it help with the sword?”
“Yes. Yes it will. But the goal is not to wield the sword, the goal is to wield your own body with purpose.”
“Tha—” I catch myself before I can give her thanks. “I appreciate it, I mean. You doing this for me, Viv.”
She nods, her eyes flashing with pride.
I’ll never be in another position where I’m taken advantage of. Never again will I surrender to a cruel lord, or an arrogant fae prince—no matter how handsome—or anyone else.
I grin up at the two of them, excited about this renewed sense of purpose. As soon as I learn how to fight, maybe I can go back to Dovenak and seek vengeance for Char.
It seems like a farfetched goal, something I’d never have considered before. But with Viv and Ken training me? Perhaps it’ll become a real possibility. At the very least, it gives me a sense of purpose in the present.
I had figured they’d throw me back in the forest. Study me. Learn how I overcame my fears in the trees. I hadn’t expected them to dedicate actual time and energy teaching me how to fight like this.
There’s no way they’re doing this out of the kindness of their hearts. To simply help me.
Right?
The fae are malicious. Cruel. Treacherous.
Heartless.
Aren’t they?
So what do they get out of this?
fourteen
Not That Bad After All
Alessia
My next day off, I spend time sitting in the rose garden, enjoying the floral scents—without getting too close to the Damask roses.
Moments like this, when I’m totally alone, with only my mind to keep me company, it’s when I miss Char the hardest. A wave of grief makes a sudden appearance. I’m glad no one’s around to see the tears fall.
Grief is a funny thing.
I’ll go about my day as if I carry no sorrow with me, then a pang will come to my heart, nearly stealing my breath and knocking me to my knees. I’ll be kneading dough, laughing at something snarky Das Celyn said, then my brain shouts at me, reminding me that Char is gone, and suddenly, the peace I found is wiped away.
