“You are a hypocrite!” I yell.
He kneels before me, placing his hands on my knees. He grows quiet, leveling me with a serious look.
“I have never slept with Fern.”
“Maybe not in the sleeping sense,” I mutter.
“I have never even kissed her. She and I are friends, and barely even that. Nothing more.”
I rub my forehead with a sigh. “I saw you two!”
“Whatever you think you saw, you’re wrong.” His eyes darken.
“No more faerie games. No manipulation. No twisted words, Rainer. I saw what I saw.”
“You saw wrong.”
“Then wha—”
“I was feeding!” He throws his hands up with a growl.
The room grows so silent that I can hear my blood pounding in my head. I don’t know what to say.
“Feeding?”
His fingers tap a rhythm on his thigh, and he takes a few deep breaths with his eyes shut.
When they reopen, they’re back to their normal color.
“I tried to stay away from you, Alessia. To spare you my truths—my curses. But I can’t do it anymore.”
“I’m not following this conversation.” My head spins all sorts of stories as I wait for Rainer to speak.
“My mum was a wonderful woman. A great woman.”
“What does she have to do with anything, Rainer?”
“Everything,” he murmurs.
I’m still stuck on the feeding part. My body trembles as I wonder if sending Eoin away was smart. Rainer is becoming unhinged. He warned me from the beginning that he would hurt me.
I just didn’t understand it then.
I barely understand it now.
He pauses, as if carefully contemplating his words.
“My mother was wonderful,” he repeats. “But my father? He was not.”
My lungs constrict as I remember his nightmare. He was just a boy. His father seemed cruel—to both him and his mother.
I angle my body at him, watching him as he speaks. He hangs his head, his shoulders slumped in defeat.
Even with my confusion and anger, my hand reflexively reaches for his. I interlace our fingers, giving him a squeeze to let him know I’m here. I needed a friend tonight, and Eoin was there for me. Now Rainer needs a friend, and it’s my turn to be there for him. As hurt as I am by his actions, he doesn’t owe me anything. The least I can do is hear him out. And based on what I’ve seen from him, I know this moment is a big deal.
“I’m telling you this, Alessia, because it’s important to me that you know why I am the way I am. Why being together is dangerous.” He clears his throat, glancing away. “This is not information I give freely.”
“Then why tell me?” I whisper.