“I don’t know. But she’s so pretty—”
“You can’t assume to know one’s internal struggles based on their outward appearance.” They grunt. “And you can’t place someone’s value solely on their beauty.”
I wince, embarrassed. “Well, why does Rainer just let her live here and have access to the pills and wine? Isn’t that feeding her addiction?”
“I don’t see how that’s your business.” Das Celyn glances toward the door then lowers their voice. “But I’ll do you the favor of explaining, so long as you let it go.”
I nod.
“Fern would likely be dead without Rainer’s help,” they say. “She’s addicted to the magic infused in many of our products—the wine, the moonberries, as I’m sure you recall.” They give me a pointed look, and I know they’re referring to the time I ate a few berries and tried to take Rainer’s clothes off. I wish they didn’t know about that. “She’s consumed so much over the years that her body adapted. It now requires a certain dosage of magic every so often, in order to survive. If she quit entirely, her organs would shut down. At least here the prince can give Fern a safe space with periodic doses of magic to keep her heart beating.”
My heart skips a beat as it dawns on me.
I thought Rainer was starving Das Celyn, but he was trying to feed them. I thought he was keeping Fern intoxicated, but he’s keeping her alive.
I thought he was keeping me against my will, but this whole time, he’s been giving me a will to live.
My lungs constrict and I ache to see him, ask if it’s all true.
“How did Fern get here in the first place?” I ask.
“Again, not your business, and it would be wise not to traipse around running your mouth, but Fern’s a changeling.”
“Changeling?” I’ve never heard of that term before.
Das Celyn sighs and scrubs at their face with a hand. “Yes, Alessia. A set of fae parents swapped out their own babe with a human infant—Fern—and intended to raise her as their own instead.”
My heart drops at the admission. The fae do steal human babies.
“And before you ask,” Das Celyn says, “I don’t know why they did it, or how they did it. Changelings aren’t common, and it isn’t my business. But typically,” they lean in and whisper conspiratorially, “faerie parents swap out their sick babies for a healthy human. It’s rare, but from the stories I’ve heard, it has happened before.”
“So Fern was raised as fae?”
Das Celyn scoffs. “The fae aren’t dense. They knew she was human, and humans aren’t exactly welcomed around Umbra. She was targeted by her peers and neighbors as she grew up. As she got older, she turned to substances for comfort. An escape, if you will.”
“Why didn’t she go back to Dovenak?”
They look at me with narrowed eyes. “Why don’t you go back to Dovenak?”
Point taken.
“I’m surprised Rainer wanted to help her.”
“Oh don’t be mistaken, he made a bargain with her.” Das Celyn busies themselves with cleaning their powder brush and wiping their hands on their apron. “He receives plenty in return.”
Once again, a blush takes over my cheeks. I don’t care to ask what it is Rainer gets in return from Fern. It’s clear as day.
She doesn’t have to be his girlfriend for him to have sex with her. He doesn’t even have to like her to enjoy her body.
The more I think about it, the more I realize that’s all it was between me and Felix. Strictly physical. A distraction. A carnal need satisfied.
Despite the niggling jealousy at the thought of Rainer’s hands on Fern, I can’t blame her for accepting the bargain. They both get something out of the deal. It sounds mutually beneficial.
But I also can’t help but pity Fern. I almost wish she’d open up to me. It’s not like I’ve had many friends in my life, so I’m not sure I could offer her a true friendship, but everyone deserves someone who understands them. And I understand what it’s like to never feel quite at home and to question if life is worth living.
I’ll need to make a better effort to be her friend.
“Rainer might have a good heart, but he also has a thing for manipulation,” I mutter. “With all those stupid bargains and deals and—”