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It took Mari hours to settle, and even when she did, her sleep was fitful. It pissed me off more than anything, and every time she tossed and turned, I got angrier.
Cameron had been her closest confidant, other than me, after Antoni died. She’d gone to bat for him, giving him promotion after promotion, even when the capos didn’t agree. He had his own fucking territory and team, plus the ear of his don, and what had he done to earn it? Nothing.
Worse, he’d thrown it in her fucking face.
I just didn’t understand why.
Why throw away a lifelong bond? Did he blame Mari for Rey’s death? Was he angry that she’d taken over the family when Antoni died? Did he think it should have gone to him?
If so, I was going to skin him alive because I knew the capos had asked him first. Granted, he wasn’t in a good place when Antoni died—his reckless spirit had always made him harder to contain, and for Joaquin, I was sure he’d been worried his son would embarrass him. Meanwhile, Mari had always been composed. Always the first to find a solution that no one else could.
Was all this because of power? I didn’t want to think ill of a man I’d known my whole life, someone I considered a friend, but what else could I do?
My thoughts drowned me, keeping me awake until I was sure I’d never sleep again, but I refused to leave Mari when she needed me. I was there for every soft whimper and agonizing cry she released in her dreams, but when I huffed and she let out a soft, annoyed sigh, I realized I wasn’t helping.
She slid closer to Nate as I slipped out of bed, the furrow of her brow smoothing as he stroked a sleepy hand down her back. It killed me to go, but I couldn’t always be everything to her. That was why there were three of us. Where one failed, the others succeeded.
Right now, she needed them and the rest they’d provide, and I needed to unleash my feelings before I lost my mind.
Instead of pacing outside the bedroom door like I wanted, I decided to go for a swim in the pool connected to our gym. After a quick stop in my room to change, I hauled ass over there.
The room was muggy, but the water was warm and clear. Exactly what I needed. I didn’t bother warming myself up, knowing my muscles were still loose from our play earlier.
Slipping under the surface brought everything to a halt. A moment of singular peace, the same kind of stillness I felt when Mari was in my arms or speared on my cock. Like everything was okay.
I lost myself in the slow, methodical strokes of my arms, forcing my speed to be as slow as possible. I wasn’t actually supposed to be doing this much activity so soon and my shoulder was screaming for me to stop, but I needed the repetition. Needed the physical action to set my brain to rights again. With every stroke, I worked through my thoughts.
What drove a person to betray their family, the people who had been there for him, regardless? Was it because of Aislynn? Did Cameron resent Mari because she’d commanded him to marry? If not that, then what?
Few things drove men like money, power, and sex. Was that it? Did he turn his back on his family for tangible yet fleeting things? Had he absolutely destroyed Mari for his own ambition? Or was it something else, something we weren’t considering?
I didn’t know, and there was the rub. The Cameron I’d grown up with would never have betrayed Mari. Then again, it was obvious that I didn’t know him anymore. Maybe he’d been lying our entire lives. If someone wanted to deceive you, they would. There was no way to stop it.
Eventually, my body forced my midnight swim to an end, though I was no closer to figuring out what went wrong. By the time I got back to the penthouse, a pool towel slung around my hips, I was ready to crash. I passed Mari’s room, heading for a shower and a change of clothes when Dominic crept out of the room with Nate close behind him.
“You okay?”
“Just needed a swim. Go back inside. I’ll be there in a second.”
Dominic’s eyes narrowed. “How long were you gone?”
I shrugged, and they both frowned at me.
“Don’t fuck up your arm when we need it most.”
The laugh took me by surprise, but leave it to Dominic to make me feel like all he cared about was my fucking body.
“I’m fine. Go back in with Mari,” I repeated. “She shouldn’t be alone.”
“She’s resting, finally,” Nate said, giving me a sad smile before looking down at his bare feet. “I should have told you sooner.”
“Would it have changed anything?” I wondered. Would telling us have altered the destruction the news caused? Would it have ended Cameron’s relationship with Cash or given Mari the peace she now desperately needed? I had a feeling the answer to all of those questions would be no. “Cameron made his own decisions. Mari knows that, and so do we. This isn’t your fault.”
“But I?—”
Dominic cut him off. “There’s no point wondering what could have been. The truth is, Cameron did what he wanted for whatever selfish reasons he had. The only thing we can do is try to lessen the fallout.”
Nate seemed to waffle, wanting to berate himself more, but eventually, his resolve firmed. “What do we do?”
