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Chapter Nine
Mari
The drive home felt like hours. All I could think about was Cameron. Sleepovers with him and Rey in Antoni’s and my suites at the manse. Stuffy family dinners with starched clothes and too many drunk adults for comfort. Hiding bowls of candy in the house so the four of us could trick-or-treat safely. Birthdays where he’d sneak into my room at midnight with a cupcake he’d bought with his allowance, just so he could be the first to sing to me. So many memories of my cousin, and most of them were good. Hell, even the bad ones had good moments.
The two of us clinging to each other beside Rey’s pyre. The way they’d held me up when we burned Antoni.
The way he’d always pushed me to do more, to be better, to reach for the stars, even when I was fucking exhausted.
My whole body rebelled against the idea that Cameron would do this, but those were my emotions talking. I had to use my brain, and I saw the truth on Nate’s face. Ace wasn’t lying. Which meant Cameron had.
I was destroyed. Gutted. Joaquin taught me that family didn’t necessarily mean that someone was good for you, but Cameron was never supposed to be an example of that.
What did this mean for Joaquin? Cameron had been the one pushing me to make a move against his father for years, and now I thought I knew why. Joaquin had a bad habit of shoving his nose where it didn’t belong. Had he found out about Cameron moonlighting as an Ace? Did he realize his son was a snake?
Did I kill the wrong man?
I wasn’t far enough gone to pretend Joaquin wasn’t a slippery fuck, but if Cameron was actually the one who had been working with Cash, what was my uncle’s crime? Was not agreeing with me punishable by death?
The whole situation made me sick to my stomach, and I wondered if it was something I would have to atone for in the future. Maybe not for my family, but for myself.
I didn’t remember getting out of the car or when we got into the elevator. All I remembered was blinking to find myself staring at the numbers, praying the damn thing didn’t stop.
I didn’t know what I would do if I saw Cameron. There was so much going on inside my head that I was as likely to sob at his feet as I was to shoot him. If Cameron had to die, I wanted an ironclad reason to do it. I couldn’t make my best friend a widow without at least that much.
Thankfully, we made it to the penthouse unscathed, and when the door opened, I was met with a welcome sight.
Greyson grinned at me from the kitchen. “Hey, baby. I’m home.”
Nothing in the world could have stopped me from throwing myself at my husband. Being in his arms felt like coming home, and when my world was untethered yet again, I needed the safety he brought me more than ever.
My men talked over my head as I focused on soaking in the comfort that was Greyson. Inhale, good. Exhale, bad. All my men were together again, my family intact, only to be shattered by this bullshit. It wasn’t fair.
But I already knew life wasn’t fair unless you made it that way, and that was exactly what I’d do to Cameron when I found my footing again.
“I missed you,” I whispered eventually. My voice felt as ravaged as my soul, and I clung to him more than I had since Antoni died. When I looked up, his eyes glowed with a mixture of sympathy and rage.
“I missed you too, reina.”
He hauled me into his arms and set off down the hall, despite my protests. Released from the hospital didn’t mean healed, but tell that to him. Finally, I let it go. Wrapped around him as tight as I could be, I let myself snuggle into the crook of his neck, desperate for a hint of that scent that was just Grey. I’d once thought if I could bottle the way he smelled, I’d never have another shitty day in my life, but it did nothing for my nerves or my sorrow this time.
I peered behind us, unsure what I’d find. Nate looked drawn, tired, and so fucking sad. Dominic looked as brutal as ever. Like he’d tear apart the building just to avenge my honor.
There was no stopping me as I reached my hand out to them. In sync, they stepped forward and held on, giving me their strength when I was feeling every brick of my life collapse. They only dropped their hold when Greyson twisted, pulling us to sit on the edge of our bed, but only long enough for them to sit next to us.
He pulled me closer, dipping his head so we were closed off to the others, lips brushing my cheek. “I’m sorry, reina.”
Those were the words that broke the dam inside me. Ugly sobs ripped from my chest, and I felt as if every breath was a razor blade slicing through me. My men ran their hands down my body, petting my back, my hair, my legs. They whispered to me, promising me I was safe. They were here. It would be okay.
The rat was my cousin. My best friend, outside of the men who huddled around me as if their bodies on mine could keep me intact. I couldn’t understand it. “He was supposed to have my back.”
I didn’t realize I’d said that out loud until Nate’s haunted whisper slithered across my shoulder where he perched his head. “I’m sorry, angel. I should have told you.”
“It’s okay.” It wasn’t.
I’d been avoiding the truth because I knew it would hurt. If it were someone who didn’t matter, Nate would’ve told me right away. I’d buried my head in the sand because the fallout felt too disastrous, and now I was paying the price.
“How can I fix this?” he croaked, hands clutching at my thigh like he was worried I’d walk away.
