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I watched Samkiel move toward the kitchen. I could hear their laughter from here, even if it was a murmured mess. “And then I feel cold and ruthless because I know the part of me that ripped through Onuna and Yejedin is not gone, even if I can’t call fire or change my form. She’s here to stay, and that is especially apparent considering my threats to eviscerate Vincent.”
“Does that upset you?”
I shook my head. “No, for the first time in a long time, I know who I am. I like me. It’s everyone else I’m worried about. I reacted so quickly earlier, and I know if anyone ever hurt him, family or not, I would rip them to pieces and sleep like a baby afterward. So,” I tipped my wineglass in a toast, “I feel a multitude of things.”
Reggie’s smile, the first real one I’d seen from him, shined a fraction brighter as he tipped his head. “I would expect no less from you.”
“Does that make me a monster?”
Reggie shook his head. “No, that makes you a protector.”
I placed my glass down on the thick stone wall and rubbed my hands together. Reggie’s eyes darted toward them as if searching for something. I glanced down at my hands. No flames, no tickle or glimmer of my power or strength, yet Reggie stared at them as if they would burst into flame at any moment. Before I could question him, the glass door slid wide open.
“Why are you out here by yourself?” Xavier asked, stepping outside.
I turned to tell him I wasn’t alone, but Reggie was already gone, not even a trail of smoke left in his wake.
Instead, I lifted a brow and said, “Are you watching me?”
“I people-watch. Also, you bailed on the game Cameron is forcing everyone to play.”
“Stalker.”
Xavier laughed as he walked to my side, carrying a plate full of cake and two forks. “Want to share?”
They were all so damned nice. I wasn’t used to it and doubted I ever would be.
Xavier gave me a small smile and simply waited, his eyes filled with hopeful kindness. I didn’t realize it had been weighing on me, and I hadn’t planned on saying it, but the words slipped out.
“I’m sorry about the dream eaters. About what they made you see.”
Shock flashed across Xavier’s face. “I’ve never had an Ig’Morruthen apologize to me before. They mostly try to kill or eat us.”
“Well, the night is young.”
Xavier laughed and picked up a fork, cutting off a small slice. “That threat toward Vincent was pretty funny, though. It’s not often he gets put in his place. He needs it sometimes.”
“I am serious, though. About my apology.” My hands gripped the rail behind me. “Samkiel loves you, all of you, so,” I paused for a second to take a deep breath, “hurting you all would hurt him, and I don’t want to hurt him.”
Xavier bowed slightly. “Well, I’m honored.”
Xavier leaned against the railing next to me, and we watched the others in the kitchen. Cameron made some weird gesture and Imogen laughed. Vincent rolled his eyes behind them, all of them gathering snacks. Samkiel, as always, looked for me. He saw who I was with and stayed with Logan and Neverra.
“It was a hard adjustment when Samkiel first got us all together. We were all so scared to say or do the wrong thing. Being under the thumbs of gods was not a pleasant experience for most of us. Vincent the least.”
I swallowed. “Yeah, I heard about that.”
“He lashed out more than usual. I think he’s just afraid of you.”
I nodded. “He is right to be. You all should be.”
Xavier stilled.
“Gabby and I had little for a very long time after my parents died. I had her, and I loved her very much. Then I lost her. I am very protective of the things I care about, and losing her didn’t help my overprotective instincts. If I had my powers, I would have ripped Vincent’s tongue from his head for how he spoke to Samkiel and not thought twice about it. Samkiel is kind, sweet, and very caring. He is good and doesn’t deserve to be treated like that. Not by me, not by family, not by anyone.”
Xavier didn’t even flinch, his eyes tracking Cameron. He held the plate out toward me. “I understand.”
I picked up the fork and cut the rich cake, taking a bite.
