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“I’ve got you,” she said as she held Julia and she felt tears again against her chest. “I’ve got you.”
She rocked Julia until tears turned to sleep.
What the fuck am I doing? I don’t do relationships, right?
The thought bounced around her head, but Vic couldn’t deny how right it felt to drift off to sleep, gently holding Julia.
10
Julia was absorbed in work the following afternoon sorting out plans for the family’s upcoming trip to Scotland. They would all be going, but Julia’s presence wasn’t needed. There was work she could do back in London at the palace, but it had also been suggested that she could take some enforced annual leave, which she was never very good at taking. It was so much easier to bury herself in work rather than actually sit with her own feelings.
She was never very good on Helen’s birthday, but she felt embarrassed about breaking down in front of Vic. How could Vic possibly want her when all she did was cry about Helen? How could Julia possibly think she might be ready for another relationship when she couldn’t stop crying about her last one?
Vic didn’t do relationships anyway, and Julia was still in love with Helen. How did one ever get over losing the one they loved? How does anyone move on from that?
Sex seemed like a good solution.
Sex with Vic was all she could think about lately, like sex might be the answer to everything. The chemistry between them was palpable. Julia could feel it intensely every time they were in a room together. But even that, even when they had been so close last night, Vic had pulled back because of Helen, because Julia had been crying about Helen.
Alexandra bowled into the room in a peach-coloured dress and sat down with Julia.
Focus, Julia. This is the Queen.
“So, all the plans are in place for the appearances in Edinburgh?”
“Yes, everything. I have laid out an itinerary for you, Ma’am. All of your visits, public appearances, downtime, the day trips you requested. It is all scheduled. Are you sure you don’t need me with you?”
“Not at all, Julia. Not at all. Take some annual leave. You never take breaks! Enjoy yourself for a change, you won’t have all of us lot cramping your style.”
The Queen’s phone rang, interrupting them. “So sorry, I must take this.” Julia nodded to her and Alexandra took her phone and went into the next room to take the call.
Julia finished up the work she was doing and headed back to her room.
Her room just reminded her of waking up with Vic that morning. She had woken up still clinging to Vic. Vic had been still asleep and Julia had found herself inhaling Vic deeply, her scent of citrus shower gel and something more, just something that was deeply her. Julia couldn’t get enough of it—like she needed Vic. She could see Vic’s nipples had leaked through her t-shirt and she hoped Vic wouldn’t be embarrassed by that. When Vic had woken up, she had been mildly awkward. The cold hard light of day had broken though their little bubble and broken the spell, the magic that had been between them yesterday and last night. Vic had held her and kissed her hair as though she were a child and then rushed off to her own room to get ready. She said she needed to get Hyzenthlay and head back to the castle to ride.
Julia stripped out of her work attire and padded around her room in her underwear trying to decide what to do. Usually she might have read a book or put some casual clothes on and gone for a walk around the palace grounds. But tonight, she felt impatient. She felt frustrated.
She got into her bed alone and turned to the pillow where Vic had been. She could smell her on the pillow. She could still feel Vic underneath her when she had been kissing her on the couch. She could still feel how it felt to kiss her. She could still feel the hunger of Vic’s mouth on her own and the way that Vic looked at her breasts like she wanted to devour them.
God, I want her to devour them.
Julia felt her right hand reaching between her legs.
Masturbation wasn’t something she often did, but she realised this was her frustration. Her need now was overwhelming and had been since Vic had kissed her against the orchard wall in the darkness and perhaps even since before then.
Her fingers slipped through her wetness and she surprised herself with how wet she was. She imagined her fingers were Vic’s. She imagined Vic was on top of her, kissing her. Vic’s tongue in her mouth, Vic’s mouth to her breast. She imagined Vic’s fingers pushing inside of her for the first time.
She gasped as she thought about it. She wanted it so very much. She needed it so badly. Her own fingers slipped against her clitoris and moved rhythmically pushing herself closer and closer to the orgasm she had been craving for days.
Her fingers moved faster and faster.
I need her to fuck me.
She imagined Vic fucking her hard and just as she thought of it and opened her legs wider, her world dissolved into a kaleidoscope of colour and she came apart in an orgasm that rushed through every single inch of her body.
She laid back and closed her eyes, allowing it all to wash over her. She smiled to herself.
Victoria Grey-Hughes, I need you to fuck me soon.
