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"She grew up in an orphanage. Not a good one. She was beaten when she made a mistake. Starved. By the time she met Yasmine, enough damage had been done. I say this as a doctor who's spent a lot of time with kids who've been abused," he spoke, without inflection or emotion.
I wanted to throw up. I couldn’t stand hearing about her childhood. The love that I'd been burying for six years was not staying quiet any longer; in fact, it was roaring with life. I'd seen her, and I wanted her back. I wanted to soothe the wounds of yesterday, especially those I'd inflicted.
"Once, someone tried to molest Yasmine. Isha fought the guy off. This was when they were in a home for teenagers; they'd aged out of the orphanage. The guy held her down, laughed at her, called her names."
I raised a hand and rubbed my closed my eyes, trying to keep the bile from rising. After I had it under control, I nodded, silently asking him to continue.
"She began to have panic attacks after that. The girls were thirteen. Babies. When they aged out of the home, they worked hard. They studied. They had jobs. Yasmine became a kindergarten teacher and Isha went into physical therapy. You know why?"
I shook my head. It was obvious I knew very little about the woman I'd fallen in love with. I'd seen her strength, noticed that spine of steel, but I'd been too blinded by how she looked. That beauty was mesmerizing, and I couldn't imagine she wouldn't trade on it.
"After the attack, Yasmine had a broken collar bone and Isha a broken leg. She healed quickly, but Yasmine needed months of physical therapy, which she didn't get on the regular. So, Isha decided she'd do that for a living, but it started then. She'd watch shit on YouTube to take care of her friend."
I remembered how she helped Clay, and I'd gone off on her for touching him. Clay had been grateful. He told me that she had helped him. All the ranch hands who met her, respected her. When I revealed to Clay how it went down with Isha after a whole lot of drinking while we were out on the range, he told me I was an idiot.
"Someone who helps someone for no good reason like she did me, even while you were yelling at her, that woman isn't interested in money, boss. I think you're barking up the wrong tree here."
"She took the money I left her, Clay."
"Whatever, boss. It's your life, but that girl, she was pure gold. You fucked up, and you got to live with it. Hell, the sad part is so does she."
Everyone had seen Isha for who she was, except the man who loved her.
"She had a panic attack with me once."
"What did you do?"
I shook my head. I wasn't about to tell this guy that she'd had her first orgasm with me. And right after, I'd asked her if she'd fucked my brother. I had her against a wall. Talk about a trigger for someone who'd been assaulted.
"She could've not taken on Flora, you know? No one would hold that against her."
"I know."
"But she made a promise to Yas, and she's kept it. Mick knew Derek, Yas's husband. They grew up in the same neighborhood. That's how we know each other. She took Flora. She works like a dog, man. I've never met someone who works as hard as she does, and doesn't bitch about it." Arturo smiled as if remembering something.
"What?"
He chuckled. "Mick was down two servers with the flu, and he was going out of his mind. It was St. Paddy's Day, and I was on call. Isha shows up, eight-month old Flora in a Baby Bjorn, and takes orders. That sound like a gold-digger to you?"
"No."
"Mick tried to pay her for the night and he almost lost his hand. We babysit and in return she helps at the bar."
I looked down at my loafers and then at Arturo. "I'm pretty good at darts. I can probably kick your ass."
Arturo's lips twitched. "We'll see."
"Thank you."
"She doesn't date."
I cocked an eyebrow.
"You fucked her up."
And that hurt more than everything else, that I'd done lasting damage to Isha. I remembered her that summer, before Ace and I did a number on her; she'd been so full of life, happy, and charming. She seemed okay now, but I wasn't sure if it was real or a mask she'd learned to wear.
"How badly did I fuck her up?" I asked, feeling emotion bite my eyes.
