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CHAPTER TEN
Jessie got almostno sleep.
It wasn’t asurprise, but it was a disappointment. With enough coffee and adrenaline, thedull cloud hovering around her brain would eventually go away for a while, butright now she was struggling.
As she sat in the passengerseat of the car at 7:38 a.m., sipping her coffee while Ryan drove them into thestation, she tried to get her bearings. Her husband knew better than to chather up right now, so they made the trip in silence. Of course, exhaustionwasn’t the only reason she wasn’t feeling especially chatty toward her husband.
Though she didn’tsay it, Jessie was feeling a little residual resentment from last night. Whenshe came out of the bathroom and slid under the covers beside him, she foundhim watching some show with videos of cute babies doing silly things.
It was almostcertainly innocuous, and Ryan seemed to only be half-watching as his eyesopened and closed lazily. But some small part of her couldn’t help but wonderif putting on the show in the first place was his passive-aggressive way ofreminding her that they hadn’t addressed the prospect of having children in awhile.
She knew that shewasn’t being fair. He could have simply turned on the TV and been staringthoughtlessly at the screen. He never laughed at what he saw. He never mademention of it, simply turning the TV off when she joined him. But she wasannoyed, nonetheless. She’d brooded over it until she finally drifted off intofitful, unsatisfying sleep.
But as she sat inthe car’s passenger seat this morning, recalling that moment, her annoyancegave way to guilt. After all, she had yet to tell him that recent testingrevealed that despite her miscarriage and multiple injuries, she couldconceive. She'd gotten that information almost two weeks ago, and yet shehadn't mentioned a word to him. That wasn't exactly a sign of being acommunicative partner.
Literally shakingher head at the thought, she tried to get out of her mental rut by shifting herfocus. It occurred to her that she hadn’t checked in with either Hannah or Katyet today and decided it was time to do so, before the morning got away from her.She tried Kat’s number.
“Hey,” her friendanswered after the second ring, “checking to make sure I’m still here?”
“That’s not asfunny as you think it is,” Jessie chided gently.
“Sorry,” Katreplied. “You’re sister’s out getting us some coffee so my brain isn’t yet ableto filter out the inappropriate jokes.”
Jessie sighed.
“I appreciate thegallows humor,” Jessie told her, “but it’s less effective when I’m not there tosee the smirk on your face.”
“But haven’t youalready checked in with our favorite babysitter to see how close to the edge Iam?” Kat asked, referencing Hannah.
Now Jessie didallow herself a little laugh.
“Not yet today,”she said. “But don’t worry—I’ll confer with your minder soon enough. Do youwant to give me your version of things?”
"Not much totell," Kat replied unconvincingly, "Just trying to get through eachday, hoping the next one is better than the last. So far, it hasn't worked outgreat."
Jessie heard avoice in the background and knew that Hannah had returned.
“Your sister’sback,” Kat told her, “and I have to run to the bathroom. Should I hand off thephone to her?”
“Sure,” Jessiesaid, deciding not to press her friend for more information she clearly wasn’tready to share right now.
“Thanks forchecking in, Jessie,” Kat said earnestly, before adding, “I’d ask how you’redoing but I really have to pee. Talk later?”
“Sounds good.”
A moment later,Hannah was on the phone.
“How’s it going,big sis?” she asked.
“Getting by,”Jessie answered. “Working a new case. Heading into the station to see whatbroke overnight.”
“The poisonmurders?” Hannah asked knowingly.
“You heard aboutthem?” Jessie said, slightly surprised.
“Just what I sawonline and on the local news,” Hannah said. “Multiple bodies found at differentwestside locations. A hazmat team called in. Victims’ names being kept underwraps for now. Your police peeps are being very tight-lipped on this one. Careto share more than that?”
“I don’t actuallyknow a ton more than that at this point,” Jessie conceded. “We only got thecase yesterday evening. We’ll see how today goes. How are things with you guys?Kat wasn’t hugely forthcoming.”
