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I dare to look at Grey, and he shoots me a warning glance.
Damn it. The other people in the group do a great job of pretending to talk amongst themselves, but I feel their pitying looks. Shit. Did I screw things up? I’m here as his girlfriend, to make facing his ex-wife easier, yet I’ve done the opposite.
“Grey, can I have a quick word with you?” Tamara asks.
“Sure,” he says.
I bite my lower lip. An uneasy feeling washes over me. What if it’s reality knocking on my door? What if I’ve been filling her shoes, and my job here is done? What if… he’s done with me?
15
Grey
When Tamara told me she wanted to talk to me a few minutes ago, I brought her inside the house. I didn’t need anyone eavesdropping, and I wondered what she had to say to me after all this time.
“Go ahead,” I say.
I don’t bother to sit but gesture for her to do so if she wants. She doesn’t.
I’d been so worried about my reaction to seeing her again. And now, I know…
My fear that seeing her would make me regret the decision to end our marriage is now squashed. What I share with Sylvie is so much more authentic than what I had with Tamara.
“I wanted to check in with you. I know we’ll see each other at the wedding and stuff, and my boyfriend will join us for the rehearsal dinner tomorrow.”
“That’s fine,” I say, without a trace of concern.
She takes out a long breath. "Good. I didn't want things to be weird between us."
I smile. “They aren’t. I’m glad you found someone. You look happy.”
“You too.” She touches her neck nervously. “There’s something else that might come out later, and I want you to hear from me.”
I square my shoulders. If she’s about to tell me she’s engaged, I couldn’t care less. But I let her speak. “What is it?”
“I’m pregnant.”
I rear back a few steps until I bump into the couch and plop down. A shiver runs down my spine, chilling my bones in the process. “You’re… pregnant?” I repeat, as if in a hypnotic trance. I dreamed of hearing this many times before when we were married.
A flick of concern touches her blue eyes. She takes a seat next to me, nodding. “Yes. It kind of happened.”
“Happened?” I run my hand over my face, trying to process everything.
I should be grateful it didn’t happen while we were married, even though I longed for it. Though… a strange sensation assaults me. She didn’t want to have a child with me—and ensured it wouldn’t happen by protecting herself. She’s found someone she wants to have a kid with. I know accidents happen, but I can’t help wondering. Does this mean…
“Was it me? Am I the reason you didn’t want kids?” I ask, my mouth working faster than my brain.
“It’s not that simple,” she says.
I draw in a breath.
When we dated, she was iffy about kids. After marriage, she changed her mind. Was it something I did? What if… what if the same thing happens with Sylvie? What if she realizes that after we commit to each other? What if?—
“Was there something wrong with me?”
“No,” Tamara says, reaching for my hand. “It just wasn’t meant to be.”
I need to know. What if it's something I can work on, and she's not saying anything to spare my feelings? A mistake I can rectify before I ask Sylvie to marry me? "Are you sure?"
