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“Her name is Lola Jaymes…”
He slumped over in the chair, his hand rubbing the back of his neck as he spoke. “I’m so sorry. I never wanted to be that guy.”
“I don’t blame you. This is just as much on me. We both drank. We both decided to have sex.” I cringed at the way that sounded. “I have no regrets.”
“I’m not that person anymore. I’ve not been since leaving here.”
“I’m not either, and I haven’t been since she came along. You gave me the best gift I could ever ask for.”
“I’ll do anything. If you need something. I can give?—”
“Stop. Take a deep breath.” I swear he was about to have a coronary. Though I couldn’t imagine the surprise this was for him. Feeling guiltier than I had a reason to, I went to the chair beside him and took his hand. “Let’s start over, like you said. We will take this one day at a time and see how things go.”
“Deal.” He looked at his watch and sighed. “I need to find my dad; he and Jess are going to help get me up to speed on things. If you need anything, just—well, you know where to find me.” He stood, that picture still gripped in his fist. Reluctantly, he put it back on the desk and walked out.
My stomach was in knots again. For Lola, I would try and let him in. It would take time. There was no inviting him over for dinner and just pretending this was a happy family-in-the-making. Hell, we didn’t even know each other. In the biblical sense, we did, but in reality, we were just two strangers in the same room.
But for my daughter, I would try.
“Wait, you little stinker. Come back here!” I laughed as I jogged after Lola.
A deep chuckle came from the man on the picnic blanket behind us. Traitor. He’d let her escape with nothing more than a diaper on. We were at the Battery enjoying a Sunday of laughter and good food…and now, I looked like a crazy lady with a baby on the run.
Scooping her up, I started to tickle her sides.
“No tittles, Mommy!”
She giggled and was still squirming as I plopped down on the blanket. I grabbed a clean sundress from her bag with my free hand. I dare not let her go until it was on. She was fast for having such short legs.
“Here, let me help.” James took the dress and with expert swiftness, got it on her before she could fight it. “There you go, all done.”
This kid hated clothes and shoes, especially socks. It was a fight most days to get her to stay dressed. Not that I blamed her, but we were in public, after all.
“Wun, Mommy. Wun.”
“Mommy is too tired to run.” I laid back on the blanket, watching James as he tried to sidetrack her with a piece of strawberry. It worked, giving me a minute to catch my breath. I swear, you need to be an extreme athlete to keep up with kids these days.
Over the last few months, we’d been able to connect, learn about each other, and become really good friends. Was there more there? Maybe, but it was complicated.
I wanted to make sure any choices I made would have Lola’s best interest in mind. Like I’d told him when he’d first found out about her, she was my first priority. She was the reason I worked so hard. She was my everything. But, he was slowly worming his way into my heart.
“You all right?” he asked, leaning over me slightly. His gaze met mine, never wavering.
Smiling, I pushed any doubts I had about him away. He was a great dad, friend, and boss. Man, that just made it weird. Well, how did you meet your husband, ma’am? In a bar, drunk off my ass. Turns out he was my boss’s son. Crazy, right?
I was losing it again. “Yeah, just a little nervous,” I admitted.
“Why? They already love you. It’ll be okay.”
Easy for him to say, he was their son. They’re required to always love him. I was the one who’d had a baby with him, knowing nothing but his first name. I looked at my watch and sighed. His parents would be here any minute now, to join us for our picnic.
They’d be meeting Lola as their granddaughter. Not just the ‘office girl’s baby.’ Was I overreacting? Possibly. Most likely—definitely. It’s something I did whenever I was truly stressed. Can we say, nutcase, party of one? That would be me.
“You’re overthinking again.” He chuckled.
My retort was cut off when Lola pushed between us and sat down on my chest. “Nacks, pweese.”
“Snacks?” I sat up, jostling her into my lap as I kissed her head.
