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NATALIE
Matt and I decided on taking two cars to Lake Arrowhead in case one of us wanted to split and go back home.
With the big screaming match we’d had after all the kids had gone to sleep, that was a definite possibility. We’d fought over him moving out of the house. The knock-down, drag-out, dish-throwing fight had ended with the words “Drop dead, Natalie” and my soon-to-be ex storming out of the kitchen. And that was just half of it.
So we took Matt’s BMW and Paige’s four-wheel-drive Jeep, which she drove with Will, me, and Bear. Tanya went with Matt.
“Mom, why didn’t you go with Dad?” Paige asked, as she followed him. I could tell from the tone of her voice she knew something was up. “And I don’t understand why we need two cars. If we needed an extra one for some reason, we could rent it there.”
I made up an excuse. “I didn’t think you wanted to sit in a car for two hours with Tanya. Plus, we can’t have Tanya anywhere near Bear.” Actually, it was the truth and Paige left it at that.
With not much traffic on the 10, we got to the Arrowhead/Big Bear exit in excellent time despite a late start on account of me having to spend a long frustrating hour on the phone with a Verizon rep to change my mobile number. When Will asked me why I changed it, I told him I’d recently gotten some disturbing spam calls. Again, that was the truth. I gave out my new number to only him, Paige, Tanya, and reluctantly to Matt. And one other person, my attorney. The rest of the world would have to wait. Though I wouldn’t put it past Matt to share the number with his sister and/or the person he was possibly paying to harass me. Which meant I could still get calls from The Whisperer.
The serpentine pine-lined road up the mountain added another thirty minutes to our trip. There was snow on the ground, and with another storm expected within the next twenty-four hours, Matt had to stop and get chains put on his tires by some hardworking locals. He deserved them around his neck. Or better yet, that untamed thing between his legs.
The snow became denser and denser as we made our ascent. Going from a dusting to at least three inches. By the time we reached the Lake Arrowhead Resort and Spa in the early afternoon, it was a winter wonderland. The recently renovated hotel looked like a deluxe alpine lodge, the picturesque setting postcard-perfect with the fresh bundle of white powder from last night’s snowfall covering both the ground and the sky-high cypress trees.
We valeted the cars and the minute I stepped into the festive, pine-scented lobby, with its enormous, beautifully decorated tree and massive, blazing fireplace, I knew I’d made the right decision to come here. With Matt’s credit card in hand, I moseyed over to check in while the others stayed behind, waiting for a porter to take care of our luggage and ski equipment.
Unable to get a suite, I’d reserved two rooms for the kids. And one for Matt and myself. Paige and Will were sharing one room with Bear while Tanya had a single room of her own. I wished I could have booked my own room—away from Matt—but there were no more rooms available, and it would raise too much suspicion among the kids for us to be separated. Fortunately, we had a double—two queen beds. If Paige or Will questioned why we didn’t have a king-size room, I’d just tell them one wasn’t available. And the truth is, one wasn’t. The resort was extremely popular and booked up for the Christmas holidays months in advance. I was extremely lucky I was able to make these last-minute reservations. Cancellations. Though not next to one another, the rooms were all on the same floor and afforded lovely views of the glimmering blue lake.
Once settled in, Matt and the kids took off for some fun in the snow, taking Bear with them. There was a nearby sledding hill. I stayed behind with Tanya and had lunch.
“Tanya, you should have gone with them,” I said, the two of us fawning over Caesar salads and an order of fries as we dined in the resort’s gourmet restaurant. “You would have had fun.”
She was seated across from me, clad in an adorable all-pink après-ski outfit that had once belonged to Anabel. A pang of sadness stabbed me; the last time we were here was with Anabel. Over a long weekend. Four months later I lost her, and soon I would be losing Tanya, though hardly in the same way. Despite her erratic behavior, I thought more about all the good times we’d shared and was going to miss her so much. Sadly, there was no way she could stay with us.
Our exchange student shoved back her knit pom-pom hat. “Honestly, Natalie, I had no interest. I’m not a snow person. I’m still really disappointed we didn’t go to Maui.”
“It wasn’t meant to be,” I responded, not mentioning that the loss of her passport took that trip off the table.
“Whatever.” She took a sip of her white wine, courtesy of our smitten young waiter who hadn’t carded her. “So, Natalie…” With her pinky finger out, she plucked a French fry from the paper cone and dipped it into the small tub of mayo. “Have you rethought anything?”
I arched a brow. “What do you mean?”
She twirled the skinny fry between her fingers. “You know… About paying my tuition and letting me stay in LA with you.”
I took a glug of my cabernet, then swallowed. “I’m sorry. Les jeux sont faits.”
She scrunched up her face. “What does that mean?”
“Oh. I thought you knew French from your British boarding school.” I’d read online that three years of French was a requirement. “Anyway, it loosely means the die is cast.” I took another long sip of my wine and looked her straight in the eye. My heart was aching. “My sweet girl, you know my situation. You have to go back home. I have no choice.”
She rose from the table and glowered at me, her eyes fiery.
“I have no choice either.”
Flinging the uneaten fry onto the table, she stormed off. Another one of her angry tantrums. Her extreme mood swings were manifesting themselves more and more. I worried she’d have a total meltdown during our vacation and spill the beans to Paige and Will that Matt and I were divorcing.
As she disappeared from the restaurant, my phone rang. The Whisperer? My stomach knotted with dread as I pulled it out of my bag. Thank goodness it was Paige. On my next breath, relief morphed into worry. My pulse sped up and I could hear my heart thudding.
Had something happened to her or Will?
FIFTY-ONE
PAIGE
“Hi, Mom!” I held my phone to my ear because there was too much noise to put the call on speaker or to FaceTime. My voice competed with the loud chatter of families at surrounding tables. Plus the endless squeals coming from kids sledding down the snow-covered hill.
