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Why do I keep making stupid mistakes?
I eyed the bed, seeing the outline of the ovwet’s body in the messy cover. I sat on the mattress and picked up her pillow, brought it to my face, and sniffed. The faint floral scent caused an inexplicable longing for…
I flung the pillow away. My heart hammered. What is wrong with me?
I eyed the reddish-brown splotch on the wall and then the handprint on my uniform. Zigqat! There are no answers here, only more questions. Forget this cabin. Forget her. I don’t need to understand to fulfill my duty; I only need to obey orders. I must leave here and not come back.
But my feet didn’t move. Instead, I grabbed my horns, leaned my elbows on my knees, and stared at the floor, praying for answers to come, willing an elusive wisp teasing the edges of consciousness to solidify.
What is on the floor? Is that water?
I got to my feet to peer at the puddle. I swiped a finger through it. It is water. Had the cabin sprung a leak? If there had been water on the floor when Seeher and I had been here, we would have noticed. She certainly would have. She missed nothing. I lifted my gaze to the vent overhead.
Through the slats, I spied a shadowy face. “You!” I reached overhead and tore the grate from the ceiling.
Wide blue eyes in a face dotted with light-brown spots and framed by choppy short blonde hair stared at me. I hadn’t disposed of the human as ordered. No wonder I didn’t remember it. This dereliction of duty would need to be rectified. I must kill her now. An intense pain axed through my skull. I grabbed my horns and doubled over.
“Are you all right?” The concern in her voice worsened the pain.
“Silence!” I shouted.
Agony slicing through my head, I dragged her out of the duct, letting her fall to the floor. The blaster would have allowed for an easy kill. Death would have been quick. But Seeher had taken the weapon, leaving me two choices. I could slit the combatant’s throat with my claws, or I could airlock her alive.
Eyes wide with fear, she scuttled away from me. “What’s my name?” she cried.
I extended my claws. “I do not care what your name is, ovwet!” My head was splitting open. Peace through chaos. I clung to our guiding principle like a mantra, seeking surcease from the agony.
“Ghadt!” the human shouted. “Ghadt!”
* * * *
I blinked, surprised to find myself in Kat’s cabin. Hadn’t I just been on the bridge? Why was she staring at me like that? The code! I’m supposed to use the code. “Katherine Ann?”
She flung herself into my arms. “Thank god, it’s you.” Her entire body trembled.
I stroked her short, silky, choppy hair, remembering how I’d sliced off the length with my claws to make the dummy I’d airlocked look more authentic. I tilted her chin and pressed my lips to hers in a desperate kiss. Our mouths fused, and our tongues entwined. I held her tight, afraid she would slip away like my memories.
“How long was I gone?” Much more time must have passed than I thought.
She bit her lip. “Um…I estimate I was in the vent for over four hours. But about half an hour after you left me, you returned with Seeher.”
“Seeher came here?” Alarm shot through me.
She nodded. “She had flipped you again like we figured she would. She searched the cabin, checking the cleansing unit and under the bed. Then you both left.”
I didn’t remember any of that. It was like it had never happened. It had seemed like only minutes since I’d joined Seeher on the bridge. What had my alter ego been doing in the four-hour time span? The brainwashing had split me into two different people. Would I ever be able to unite them again? Would Kat ever be safe with me?
We had figured out a trigger and one anti-trigger. There could be dozens more.
Kat slipped out of my arms. “I need to pee. I was afraid to jump down and use the facility. I didn’t think I’d be able to get up there again.”
A flaw in our plan. But it had always been imperfect at best. We didn’t have a lot of options.
She disappeared into the cleansing unit, returning a few minutes later.
“Why is there water on the floor?” I asked.
“I knocked over the jug.”
