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I flushed. She’d caught me. I’d been thinking about Kat. A week had passed since I’d seen her. After our escapade in the garden, an edict had come down from my father and my mother forbidding us to have contact until completion of the deprogramming. Guards had received orders to stop me if they spotted us together. Ditching my sitter to steal a few kisses had backfired. Obviously, the guard had reported my behavior.
I prayed Kat didn’t think I’d abandoned her. I’d sent word through Nadir I’d see her as soon as I could.
“You must focus,” Seeher said.
“I thought you wanted me to relax,” I quipped. I’d had eight sessions now. Each one started with her questioning me and challenging my responses, but most of the time was devoted to relaxation exercises. I didn’t see the efficacy, but, surprisingly, time flew by during those segments, eating up a couple of hours in the blink of an eye.
“Pay attention.”
“Moktu,” I apologized. Nothing could slow my progress or displease Seeher. I had to get a good report, not only to clear my name but so I could see Kat again. I kicked myself for risking our limited time together for a few kisses. I should have waited.
I could have snuck out and seen her anyway, except the king had threatened to send her home immediately if I did.
“Listen to my voice, and let yourself relax. Allow thoughts to come and go.” Seeher’s tone softened, becoming even and melodic. “Take a deep breath and exhale, letting your concerns drift away like leaves on the wind.”
My chest rose and fell.
“Your body is relaxed and comfortable, your spirit calm, your mind open and receptive. You remain awake and alert, but relaxed, listening to my voice. Picture yourself at the top of a very tall staircase. Do you see it?”
I nodded. There was a gilded staircase in the tallest turret at the palace. From the top, the steps spiraled eight floors to the bottom.
“You’re going to descend the staircase, slowly, step by step, becoming increasingly relaxed, but still alert, with every step…”
* * * *
“How do you feel?” Seeher asked.
“Great! Not at all tired after descending 120 steps,” I quipped.
She laughed.
The relaxation exercises always energized me. I stretched, lifting my arms over my head, sneaking a glance at the chronometer. Again, to my surprise, I saw two hours had passed since the session had begun. It seemed like mere minutes ago I’d mentally started down the stairs.
“We’re almost done.” Of course, she caught me looking at the clock. It was hard to slip something past a woman with four eyes.
“I’m amazed—as usual—at how much time passes during these sessions,” I explained.
“Time slows when you’re in a state of deep relaxation.”
“I guess.” I would have said time sped up. Hours vanished in a flash.
“Grezz!” she said.
My jaw dropped at the insult. “I beg your pardon?” Grezz was Ara-Cope for an elite deadbeat, a person of wealth and power who contributed little to society.
“Vytor.” Her gaze locked on mine.
Valor? What about valor?
“Fogyt evuk,” she said.
“Access denied to what?” I asked. What is she talking about?
“Grezz, vytor, and fogyt evuk—those were your triggers,” she said. Then she broke into a wide smile. “They’re not anymore!”
She rose from her seat and removed the brain scanner from my head. “I’ll take this. You won’t need it. We’re done here.”
“For today.” I nodded.
