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I’d cried and begged to stay. Even though the two of them drank and did drugs in ways that scarred me enough to never want a single drop of alcohol for the rest of my life, the idea of being homeless was even more terrifying.
But there was no changing their minds. Mam packed my bag and sent me on my way. I was on the streets for a few weeks before I managed to figure out how to get into a foster home, which was better in some ways and worse in others. Over the next few years, I endured a harsh and brutal early introduction to the world of adulthood while my mother and Darren went on to have four children together: Vivi, the twins Shelly and Robbie, and the youngest, Eamonn. I only got to see them on the rare occasions Mam allowed me to visit, so I never really had much of a relationship with them during the earlier part of their lives.
Then, a few years later, Mam and Darren self-destructed in a way that was surprising to nobody, and their children were placed in the foster care system. Luckily, they’d all been able to stay together. I offered to become their guardian, but I’d been twenty-three years old at the time with no money and no long-term form of accommodation. I’d been quickly deemed an unsuitable candidate. Even now, at thirty-one, I felt like I’d failed them. I didn’t earn enough to support four kids, nor would my studio flat ever be big enough to house them.
Despite that, I’d managed to maintain a friendship with Vivi, and the younger ones were always happy to see me when I visited. Vivi was fourteen and had her own mobile phone, so we could keep in touch.
“Hello,” I answered, bringing the phone to my ear.
“Hi, Maggie!” she greeted.
“Vivi, how are you?”
“I’m fine. I just …” she trailed off, and I heard the nerves in her voice. I recognised them well. She needed something but felt bad about asking.
“What is it? Do you need something? Because you know I’m happy to help,” I said, gently encouraging.
She cleared her throat. “Well, actually, um, honestly, Maggie, I hate to do this, but my class is going on a field trip to Glendalough this month, and I need twenty euros to pay for the bus and lunch. Could you loan it to me? I promise I’ll pay you back.”
My heart sank just listening to her because I knew how it felt to never have money for school trips. As far as I knew, Vivi’s foster parents didn’t ever give her or her siblings cash for incidentals.
“Of course,” I replied. “I’ll drop it over to you tomorrow, and please don’t worry about paying me back. I hope your brothers and Shelly are doing okay.”
“They’re good. Though Eamonn had a stomach bug all week and had to stay off school. Ken and Delia weren’t happy about it.”
Ken and Delia were their foster parents, and though they were decent folks, they weren’t the most generous or loving. I was pretty sure they became foster parents for the money and to have the ability to boss a bunch of kids around and make them do all the chores they were too lazy to do themselves. Still, they were far better than the foster parents I’d endured.
“Poor Eamonn. I’ll bring something nice for him tomorrow and for Robbie and Shelly, too.”
“Thanks, Maggie. They’ll appreciate that. I’ll see you then.”
“See you,” I said before ending the call.
Communicating with Vivi wasn’t what I imagined talking to a typical fourteen-year-old was like. She’d had to grow up fast, just as I had, but it was worse for her in a way because I only had myself to worry about. Vivi had three younger siblings to shelter under her wing. That was why I always went out of my way to help make her life easier in any way I could.
I’d made it clear if she needed something, she shouldn’t ever hesitate to contact me. I wasn’t rich by any stretch of the imagination, but I’d give her whatever I could manage when she needed it.
I was so wrapped up in thinking about my half-siblings I almost forgot I was still on the bus. A loud clatter sounded from the upper deck, and then the group of businessmen started filing down the steps. They were getting off now, thank goodness.
I slid my phone back in my bag just as someone shouted, “Hey, Red, can I get your number?”
Pores prickled at the back of my neck, and I just knew one of the drunks was directing his question at me. I thought the best thing to do was ignore him, but he wasn’t deterred, “Red, hello, are you listening to me?”
Blowing out a nervous breath, I turned to face them, but then saw he was making his way down the aisle. A shiver tiptoed down my spine when he moved in front of the businessmen, eyeing them coldly. He didn’t breathe a word, but his expression said it all. Leave her alone.
