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Prologue
Samuel
Forever is a word for memories, not people.
Nighttime is suddenly illuminated with bright flashes as enemy gunfire rains down. The unbearable smell of blood and gunpowder engulfs me, leaving my senses tainted with a bitter aftertaste. Every muscle in my body locks up, and I hesitate. Crucial seconds tick by that I could have been returning fire. Maybe then he wouldn’t have died. Maybe then he wouldn’t have bled out in my arms screaming for me to take care of his sister.
It is supposed to be a simple enough mission for our men. Get in, make the connection, and get out. It all is going according to plan, until it isn’t. Matthew and I are in the second of three Humvees heading back to the FOB, Forwarding Operating Base. It is a night mission in Afghanistan and our security detail are escorting us back.
Bullets begin spraying down on us as we pass through a small city. Although our armored Humvees can see some action, they can’t withstand the amount they are receiving. We have no other choice but to stop, making a perimeter around ourselves to return fire. This is my first experience in combat since joining the Army. While everyone is piling out of the vehicles, I hang back. For just a moment I sit there frozen in place with my military training running through my mind. Orders are being thrown out, with a deep breath I steady my mind, grab my M4 and join my team. Bullets are showering down on us from every direction. I take a few enemies down before I hear the screaming behind me. John goes down in a blur. Matthew, our combat medic, rushes to his side. He is bleeding from the lower leg where the bullet shattered his bone. Matt pulls John into the back of the vehicle and begins bandaging the wound. He administers an IV then goes around to the side of the truck to pull him in further. As I turn the corner following Matt, a rogue bullet flies at the side of his neck. Time stands still as I watch my best friend collapse to the ground. I drop my weapon and crawl through the rubble to where he has fallen. It is so dark, the only light is the flickers of gunfire from overhead. His wound shows itself to me in spurts of light, each time looking worse as the blood pools out.
“Matt, can you hear me? You’re going to be okay. I just need to put pressure on your neck,” I yell down at him. Arterial spray covers me as I try to apply pressure. I know this is a substantial wound, but I am doing everything in my power to keep my best friend alive.
“Take care,” he gasps for air as he tries to get the words out.
“Shut the hell up, Matt. You aren’t going anywhere.” I don’t want him to waste his strength, but he is a determined asshole and he is going to say what he needs to.
“Take care of Marcy.” He grabs my face in his hands. “Take care of my sister, man!” The pleading in his tone sends chills through my body. Before I can respond, I see the life leave his eyes. He’s gone. Here one moment, gone the next. His hands fall to the side as I sit there clutching his body to mine.
“Matthew, you bastard, wake up! Don’t you leave me. Don’t you fucking leave me!” I shout as tears mix with his blood cascade down my face.
“Marcy needs you not me!” I plead but it’s too late.
This isn’t how it is supposed to go. I should have been shielding him as he worked. As I begin spiraling into the abyss, hands grab me, hoisting me to my feet. The chaos around me springs to life again. I pull Matt to my chest trying to lift him into the Humvee. I can’t leave him here. We are brothers for life, through this one and the next. Finally shouts ring out that the perimeter is secured and relief floods my body. A ranger comes to my aid lifting Matt into the vehicle. We pile into the trucks making our way back to camp.
The scene of Matt collapsing to the ground plays over and over in my mind as I stare at his cold lifeless body. The ride is a quiet one as we let sink in the fact that we are returning with one less soul than we had before.
I wake to a cold sweat covering my body and tears streaming down my face. The dream sits in the foreground of my mind like a tidal wave ready to wreak havoc on all that comes before it. I scrub my hands down my face to loosen the tension that’s built up. It’s always the same dream. Always about Matthew. I am plagued by the vision of seeing my best friend die in my arms over and over.
I check the time on my phone, seeing it’s the middle of the night. Of course it is. I can’t fucking take this. These dreams have haunted me since that night. I know I won’t be able to sleep again so I throw the blankets off me to get out of the bed. The only thing that quells the night terrors is to either drink until I black out or work out until my muscles are screaming in pain. Tonight, I choose the latter. Maybe I’ll end up on a bender too. Who knows? Heading down to the gym I get to work removing the memories from my mind.
As the sun rises, I’m sweating my ass off and trying to catch my breath. Grabbing a towel from the rack, I wipe away the terrors that haunt me in the night. The darkness fades from view and I’m rewarded with a clear head, that hopefully lasts the rest of the day.
Chapter 1
Marcy
“Marcy, you are a force to be reckoned with. Thank you for all you did to help Stormy and me.” As I drive through the city Sebastian's voice fills the car from the speakers. A smile spreads across my face knowing that all the hours I spent diffusing the situation paid off. That’s why I got into public relations. I wanted to help protect people from the nasty press that is always present in big cities.
I remember being bombarded when my parents’ died, and how helpless I felt. Being the daughter of a politician made the press go wild wherever I went. Microphones and cameras were shoved into my face, making life miserable for me. Now, I help those that go through similar situations while also helping clients like Miles and Sebastian Knight who find trouble at every turn. Since they are my biggest clients, I guess I can’t complain and it’s because of them that my business took off. Somehow I landed the wealthiest clients in New York City. After that, more people followed suit.
“Seriously, you don’t have to keep thanking me. I was doing my job,” I insist.
“Well, you did it spectacularly. So,” there’s a pause and I know by now that Sebastian has some crazy idea up his sleeve. He’s definitely the brother most prone to provoke the press, and me for that matter. I sigh and wait for him to finish. “Miles and I were talking and we know your birthday is coming up so we wanted to throw you a little party as a thanks for all you do for us.” He asks me this every year but I always decline.
Every year, the calendar slyly nudges me towards a date that holds a special place in my heart. It's my birthday, an event I've always shared with my partner in crime, my brother Matthew. Once I hit eighteen, the wild parties morphed into more subdued celebrations. Our unique bond, unfazed by our nine-year age gap, was a comical twist of fate that had us blowing out candles together. Matthew's joy for our mutual birthday was infectious, dubbing me his 'best-ever birthday present'. My mind drifts to thoughts of him and I together and my throat clogs with emotion.
“You don’t need to do that, Sebastian,” I assert. They all know the pain that surrounds me on that day.
“Please let us do this for you. Stormy and Lizzie are itching to plan it. And before you say no just consider this. It’s been a crazy year for all of us and we could use an excuse to celebrate.” I pull into the parking garage for my apartment building, always a plus in the city, shift the car into park and sit for a moment, thinking about the proposition. Matthew died while he was serving in the military. He’s been gone for eighteen years, our day continues to be difficult to get through for me. Sitting here in the car, I contemplate what I should do. Maybe it’s time to face this day head on. Maybe it could be used as a remembrance.
“Are you still there?” Sebastian asks.
“Yes, sorry. I’m here. I was just thinking. Could we maybe include Matthew and let it be a celebration of life? It doesn’t have to be a big party…” I emphasize.
“Yes! That sounds perfect. Let us take care of everything.” I sigh, nodding my head even though he can’t see me.
“Stormy and Lizzie are going to be thrilled. Is there anything special you want?”
