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“Mara… she didn’t care about me. Not in the way a mother should, and I’m scared that—what if it was just in her nature? If part of that nature resides in me, I’m scared I’ll be the same. What if, when our baby’s born, I end up feeling how she felt?”
Despite all her terrible flaws, Mara definitely felt some kind of disconnect between herself and motherhood. If that trait is genetic, am I doomed to follow the same path as her?
“Alena…” Kristof’s warm palm lightly cups the side of my face, his fingertips kneading my hairline while his thumb traces my cheek. “You are nothing like your mother. If this is a nature versus nurture thing, then I am certain that not even a whisper of her exists inside you. You’re a hundred times better as a person, and as a mother, you will be a million leagues more loving than she ever was.”
My eyes warm with tears and my lower lip wobbles. “You really believe that?”
“I know it to be fact.” He leans down and presses a sweet, affectionate kiss to my lips. “You’ve already done more to protect this baby than she ever did for you.”
“How?” My mind runs blank as the tears threaten.
“You killed Mikhail, protecting both of you. You played her mind games to ensure you stayed with little egg and kept our baby safe and growing for as long as you could. To me, that’s amazing.”
“You really think so?” Kristof blurs slightly through my tears.
He nods firmly. “I know so.”
My heart swells as I lean onto my tiptoes and take another kiss. His belief is the pillar of support that I need.
Our walk resumes, and Kristof detours to the old gazebo as my feet and ankles protest the walking. As we approach it, the thought of the night he stole my first kiss pops into my mind. I’d been so sheltered back then, so naive to the way things worked and the horrors that awaited me. That girl in my mind feels like an entirely different person.
“We’ve come so far,” I murmur, reaching out to touch one of the wooden supports. “We went from secret crush to your kidnapping me to sex pet, then girlfriend, and now… baby mama?” I chuckle softly and release Kristof’s hand, making a beeline for the bench. Sitting down will offer me the sweet relief I crave.
“The next step?” Kristof asks behind me. “How about wife?”
As I turn to sit, my heart punches up into my throat and my mind runs empty. Kristof is down on one knee, holding a small red box in one hand. Already in the lowering motion, I lose all strength in my legs and hit the bench with a small thump. The tears from earlier well up once more.
“Kristof,” I choke out, and a tremble shoots through my entire body.
He shuffles forward on his knee and then opens the box. Nestled in red silk is a silver engagement ring with a pear diamond embedded on top. The diamond is surrounded by the same amber gemstones that decorated the second collar he gave me—the collar Mara ripped away.
“Oh, my God,” I gasp softly, pressing one hand to my breastbone. “I–I never imagined you to be the marrying sort.”
“There were a lot of things I wasn’t until you walked into my life, Alena. I always thought of myself as a selfish man with one goal in life, and nothing was going to sway me from that. I was happy with that, with my lot in life. And then you fell into my lap. You started as just a decoration to an old desire, but quickly, you showed me that I wasn’t as selfish as I thought. Caring for you, pleasing you, loving you all came first. I grew selfish in other ways—selfish for your touch, for your kiss and your look. Everything else became a low second beyond just your presence. In these recent months, I even learned that there is no limit to what I will do to keep you safe. You consume me, Alena, and I want you to be proud when you call me your husband.”
As he speaks, the tears pour, and I don’t have the strength to stop them. Everything he says makes my heart swell bigger and bigger. It takes all my restraint not to ugly sob.
“I want everything. Every silly bit of domestic bliss that you can give me. I love you, Alena. I love you so much that I can’t breathe without you. My world isn’t worth existing without you in it, and I want to spend every single second I have left with you and our baby. I should have asked you months ago, but I was scared. Of what, I don’t know. It hardly matters anymore, but now? Now, I’m only scared of losing you. So, Alena…”
Kristof forces a deep breath.
“Will you marry me?”
It’s not something I even need to think about. Surging up from the bench, I rush forward and throw my arms around his neck as he rises to catch me.
“Yes!” I declare happily, tears flooding down my cheeks. “Yes, yes, a million times yes!”
Kristof’s mouth collides deeply with mine and his arms wrap around my waist, but something changes as he pulls me close. My gut cramps awkwardly, and an unfamiliar dampness seeps down my thighs.
“Alena?” Kristof must have felt me tense because he’s immediately cupping my face. “What’s wrong?”
“My—I think my water just broke!”
* * *
Everything hurts. Muscles in my arms and legs complain with the slightest movement, and an unfamiliar weight rests on my abdomen when I finally come to. After twenty-seven long hours of labor, sleep is a gift, but it doesn’t last as long as I desire. My eyelids are heavy and the allure of more sleep is incredibly tempting. I resist. I need to be awake because my baby is here and I don’t want to waste a single moment.
Forcing my eyes open, I bite back a yawn and scan the room. My attention quickly locks on Kristof, who sits next to my bed with a small pink blanket bundled in his arms. His face is the softest I have ever seen it as he gently rocks the blanket bundle back and forth, and the smile on his face is the widest I have ever seen. Without his shirt, our baby is nestled against his chest, and I vaguely recall a nurse talking about the benefits of skin-on-skin contact this early for bonding. I’ll need to get her to repeat everything because I’ve completely forgotten.
