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“It wasn’t before,” he points out.
“Right. Because before nobody knew, so we didn’t have prying eyes judging our every move. And while Marcus believes I would report objectively, he also believes that even the perceived conflict of interest from viewers is enough to reassign me.”
“To what?” he asks.
“Beat reporter. Mostly women’s sports.”
He nods. “Important, but not what you wanted.”
“Exactly. It’s an honor to cover any sport, but to be named a football team’s correspondent as a female was a huge step for me. For women everywhere. And now I’m back to where I’m stereotyped to be.”
He’s quiet a long time before he asks, “Is it worth it? To lose out on your dream, I mean. For me.”
My bottom lip quivers as I think over his question.
Is it worth it?
“I don’t know,” I say softly.
He looks hurt by my words, and that’s when I realize something.
It’s everything to me right now, and it hurts right now.
But in the end…it’s just a job. Someday I’ll retire just as my predecessor did, and what will I have left then?
Love.
Family. Jonah.
People. Relationships.
And, hopefully…Lincoln.
The thought is comforting, and finally the tears start to ease up.
“We can’t know because we can’t see into the future,” I amend. “But what I do know is that if we fight through this thing and come out on the right side of forever, then I’ll be able to look back and know it was worth it. And I also know that I’m not losing out on my dreams if I get to be with you.”
He nestles his nose along my neck before he drags his lips across the space there, and then his mouth lands on mine.
I sigh softly into him.
I missed this.
But I also know that I’m not the only one going through some things. I pull back.
“What happened with Asher?” I ask softly.
He sighs and lifts me off his lap, setting me beside him before he gets up to pace around the room a little. “After I stormed out of here, I called him and told him he needed to come clean or I’d do it for him.”
I’m surprised by that, but I school my features not to let it show.
Maybe I shouldn’t feel surprised considering I knew all along he’d do the right thing, but I am.
“He wasn’t real thrilled with me, but he shocked the hell out of me by coming to my office the next morning and telling me he was ready to confess all to Jack. He did, and Jack reported it, and the league came back with his punishment this morning. I feel like I’ve been to hell and back today, and my little brother is suspended for this entire season, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
“God, Lincoln. That must be so hard on you,” I murmur. I shake my head. “I know it’s unrelated, but it just feels like everyone we hold dear is getting caught in the crosshairs of all this.”
His brows dip. “Yeah.”
