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I shrugged. “I’d consider myself very dependent. I need you just as much as you need me.”
“No. You need me because you want to. You like to have me. I need you because your absence feels like being dropped in the cold, dark ocean.”
I stiffened immediately. That sounded...serious. That sounded like...more than friendship.
“And what does that mean for us?” I asked, grinding slightly as his fingers adjusted around my waist. I may or may not have wanted one of them to slip under the hem of my bathing suit. Just to see what it would be like.
“That we both have attachment issues and should seek therapy immediately.” His smile sounded in his voice, and I laughed aloud. The odd spell was broken, and it was a welcomed break in the confusing tension building in my body.
“What’s so bad about needing people? I’m happy with the set-up. Aren’t you?”
“Now you see my point, sea thing.”
His chin landed on my shoulder as he adjusted me in his grip, a gentle hand swiping over the left side of my ribs when— “Oh, fuck.” I immediately slapped a hand over my mouth as my body twitched. Did I just say that out loud? And why the hell did his fingers on my ribs feel so good as to provoke me to say that?
Jonah quickly steadied me, his body rigid beneath mine. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.” My answer was hardly audible. I just kept staring at the freezing expanse in front of me, eyes gaping. Perhaps it was the cold, or the moment, or my painfully deprived body that was suddenly disagreeing with my shielded mind, but Jonah’s fingers grazing the left side of my ribs provoked a sensation inside of me that I hadn’t felt in years. A sensation I had both missed and hated. It was like a button of sorts, sending energy straight through my center and down to my toes, flooding me in vulnerability.
A deep gulp of air rushed through me as Jonah placed his fingers back on my side. He touched the spot once again, though softer this time, watching me over my shoulder and observing my reaction. The sensation returned, shooting straight between my legs. I couldn’t help but melt into him as my eyes fluttered. “That… Jonah. Oh, god,” I whispered.
“Did you know about that spot?” he murmured in my ear.
I shook my head.
He dropped his left hand from my ribs and placed it over my waist, removing his right hand from its position and attempting the same touches in the same spot but on my right side. I kept still, staring ahead as he dragged his finger over each bump in my ribs, drew lazy circles with his pointer finger, grabbed it with a full palm… Nothing.
“Is this okay?”
I nodded. I wasn’t sure what possessed me to cross such a line, and with Jonah, for fuck’s sake, but he’d discovered something. Something I needed to know more about. The key to a box that had been locked for so very long.
Jonah’s caress returned to the left side of my ribs, and my body answered immediately. He slid delicately over my freezing skin as my head dropped back on his shoulder, my eyelids shutting out the view in front of me as if my body chose to focus solely on my newly discovered weak spot. The bubbles that had formed in my abdomen now spread freely through me. My hips dug into Jonah’s legs shamelessly as he kept me tight with his supporting arm. I was sure his gaze was following every movement I made. I could feel it.
“Shh, Kai.” Jonah’s whisper reached my ear from what must have been only millimeters away. “The people around us don’t get to hear you make those sounds.”
I perked up quickly. I hadn’t even realized I was making any. “Jonah, stop.” His hand lifted from my ribs in an instant as my good sense slammed back into my brain. What the fuck just happened? “Oh my god. Oh my god. Jonah, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” he said, a small giggle ending his sentence. He kept my stiff body seated properly between his arms, no part of me exposed to the dangerous sand. “It’s good for you to learn about those things.”
“Fuck, that’s fucking mortifying.” I couldn’t even turn around to look him in the eye. Holy shit. I wanted to lock myself in a closet and hide there forever.
“It’s just me, Kai.”
“Exactly.” I fussed, pushing his arms away and searching for a safe way to stand. I needed to exit this situation immediately, but I did not want to step on a crab. He chuckled once again and curled me tighter in his embrace, lifting me up and carrying me out of the water. When my feet finally hit the ground, it was on dry land.
I crossed my arms nervously and tried to play it off. “Per usual, you have successfully avoided a difficult but important conversation about your mental health.”
“Like I said, we should seek therapy immediately.”
The hot air around me warmed my cold skin, and the heavy ends of my waves grazed over my bikini strings, releasing cold droplets that slid down the backs of my legs. Jonah smirked at me, his long, wet hair pushed back and his black shirt clinging to him.
Oh god…maybe he was kind of handsome. He looked the same as always except…not. His eyebrows were still unkempt, his nose was still the exact same shape as the day I met him, and his eyes were still green. But—
No.
“Do not look at me like that!” I said, splaying my hands over my chest and stomach, covering my mostly naked body.
“I’m just surprised no one’s been able to find that before.” His grin grew to an obnoxious size, making him look almost joyful. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen him so amused.
