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There’s very little I would consider a necessity in life, but after hearing Daph say those three little words, I have no doubt everyday I’m forced to live in their absence will be nothing short of a slow and torturous death to my soul.
“But that’s all you ever give me—broken pieces at a time.” Her voice cracks, a shaky sob threatening to break through. “And with the way they’re carving me up, if we keep at this, there’s not going to be much of me left. So, if you want me to stay, I need you to give me all of you. I need to know you’re all in.”
The restraint I’m forced to harness to prevent myself from shouting YES is a feat unlike any I’ve battled before. My stomach sours, the nausea threatening to overtake me as my body attempts to rebel against my mind.
In all the years I have known Daph, I don’t think she’s ever looked as stunning or vulnerable as she does right now, standing before me, demanding I, at long last, make a choice. As if the choice was ever mine to make. I have spent years thinking I didn’t have a heart, but the truth is I do—I’d just given it away when I was eight years old.
Daphne may not have all of me, but she has the one part that matters. She’s shielded it from the darkness my sins have cultivated, allowing at least some form of me to remain pure. This is the part of me I want her to hold onto—the only part of me worthy of her love. It’s what I want her to remember above all else when the rest of me inevitably self-destructs.
And when that happens, I don’t want her anywhere near me.
“I’m sorry.”
Her shoulders visibly deflate, though the strength of her determined stare never wavers. “Then I need you to let me go.”
The beating I threw Lucian tonight pales in comparison to the devastating blow her words just delivered. My body slightly sways, struggling to remain upright as I’m forced to watch her back away. The distance between us grows all too quickly, with her pausing briefly only when she reaches the door.
“You know, it’s ironic. I was mad at you for pitying me, when I’m guilty of the same offense.” The strangled sound which escapes her throat falls somewhere between a scoff and a laugh. “I do pity you, Nick. I pity the day it finally dawns on you. One day you’re gonna wake up and realize I was the one.”
She storms out, leaving nothing behind but the faint scent of strawberries, and the haunting echo of her parting words.
She’s got it wrong, though. I already know she’s the one.
Deep down, I’ve always known. Doesn’t change a thing.
If anything, it’s the reason I can’t keep her.
CHAPTER 28
NOW
DAPHNE
“There she is!” Shannon shrieks.
She and Mitch barrel into me, enveloping me in a hug and knocking the graduation cap from my head. Mitch bends down to scoop up the square hat I’ve bedazzled, laughing as he takes in the shock painted across my face.
“What are you guys doing here?!” My arms squeeze Shannon tighter, squishing the bouquet of flowers she’s holding between our bodies. “You’re supposed to be in California!”
“Excuse me, bitch. My ass doesn’t graduate until tomorrow.” My best friend’s voice gives me pause, my head frantically scanning the area. Shannon chuckles, holding up her phone to reveal Jonsie’s smiling face proudly on display. “Today is all about you.”
“Oh my God.” I reach out as Shannon relinquishes her hold on the cell, allowing me to pull the screen closer to my face. “You watched?”
“Of course I watched! Like 3,000 miles could keep me from cheering you on as you walked across that stage. You better watch me walk tomorrow!” she demands, feigning outrage before the two of us erupt in a fit of giggles. “I’m so proud of you, Daph.”
My smile widens, growing to the point one would think it’s been months since I spoke with Jones and not a mere twelve hours. There isn’t a day that passes that we don’t talk in some capacity. She is my lifeline.
“I miss you so much, boo.” My voice trembles with emotion.
“Ditto, babe. But no worries, I’ll be back next week.”
The thought of having her permanently home, so easily accessible to me after four long years, heals a part of me I didn’t even realize was broken. “I cannot freaking wait!” I exclaim, only to have my excitement tinged with worry as I look to her parents. “Are you sure you guys didn’t screw up your travel plans for me?”
“Stop.” Shannon holds up a hand, waving me off. “We’re flying out tonight. We’ll get there with plenty of time to spare. Honestly, sweetheart, did you really think we’d miss your graduation?”
The notion seems ludicrous now that she says it aloud. I can’t think of a time when either of them has ever treated me with anything less than the same love and adoration they reserve for their children. My chest tightens, a ball of emotion wedging itself at the back of my throat. “It means the world you guys came.”
“I’m surprised you didn’t hear us. Nick and the boys were screaming so loud when they called your name, they damn near got us kicked out of the section.”
