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We study each other quietly. I don’t know what his views on abortion are. I just feel that it’s something we should talk about.
His expression has gone carefully blank. “Gaby told Tyson that you’d thought about it.”
“If I keep the baby, Cam’s always going to be around, and part of me wishes that wasn’t the case. Terminating would be one way to cut myself off from him completely. We would never have to deal with him again.”
He looks away. He’s so handsome. His hair is still wet from his shower. He’s missed one small speck of blood that’s still on his temple. I want to reach up and wipe it away, but I hold back. He hasn’t touched me yet, apart from tucking my hair behind my ear. He hasn’t kissed me. I long for him to take me in his arms, but I understand that we need to settle everything first.
He’s still silent. Eventually I say, “What are you thinking?”
His gaze comes back to mine. “That it’s your decision, not mine.”
“Henry… come on. I know you better than that. Don’t give me the pro-choice argument. I want to know what you think.”
Still, he hesitates, and it’s only then that I remember what’s been happening with his nephew. “Oh, what happened with Rangi?” I ask.
He exhales with a deep sigh. “His girlfriend had the abortion. On Saturday evening, he took an overdose.”
I gasp. “Oh no!”
“He’s okay,” he adds hastily. “They took him to hospital, but he’s back home now.”
“Oh, you should have told me.” But of course I’d turned off my phone, so even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t have been able to call me.
“I was on my way back from Sydney,” he reminds me. “I didn’t get in until one a.m. I saw that Rangi had called around eleven but I was too tired to call him. It was only the next morning that Philip rang to tell me.”
“How was he?”
“Philip said Rangi wouldn’t stop crying or come out of his room, and he asked me to come over and talk to him.”
My eyebrows rise—I know Henry doesn’t get on with his brother, and it must have taken a lot for Philip to call him.
“I’m going to send Rangi to Greenfield,” he says. “I’m hoping it’ll turn things around for him. He’ll either forget about Ellie, or he’ll have the opportunity to qualify in a trade or something and find himself a job, and then he’ll be able to prove he’s a better prospect for a boyfriend to her parents.”
“And Philip agreed?”
“Yeah, so it shows how desperate he is. I’m glad he’s letting me help.”
I nod. “That’s good. And was Rangi pleased?”
“Yeah, I think so. He was just so sad about the baby. I felt bad about it.”
“Because you weren’t there to take the call?”
“Yeah. And because when he told me Ellie was pregnant, I said he had to keep his opinions to himself.” He picks at a piece of fluff on his track pants. “Maybe if Rangi had told her parents that he wanted the baby, they’d have let him stay with Ellie and bring the baby up together. They probably wouldn’t, but I took that option away from him.”
“You didn’t, Henry. Society did. It’s tough for guys to just sit back and do nothing.”
“I know it was the right thing to do. But I feel bad, that’s all.”
I catch his eye. “That’s why I want you to be honest with me. I want to know what you really think about me having this baby. I’m not saying the decision is up to you. But I do want to know.”
He drops his gaze to my tummy for a long moment. I can see him fighting with himself, debating whether to do as I ask, or keep his opinions to himself. He said that Shaz accused him of not being open with her. I’m sure that’s going to affect his decision.
Sure enough, he looks back at me and says, “I want to be with you. But… I don’t want you to terminate it for me.”
I inhale, then let out a long, relieved breath as I smile. “All right.”
His eyebrows rise. “You’re okay with me saying that?”
