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“No… you sound like my mother. She used to call us that. It’s… a real comfort.”
Karolina hugged me tight. “I am so sorry she isn’t here. Your mother was a delight. A beautiful person. She would be proud of you.”
“Is it good? One line or two?” Rick’s voice echoed from the bathroom. It gave nothing away.
“Two is pregnant. One is not,” Karolina said.
“What if it’s like one and a half?” Rick asked.
He walked over and showed the test to his mother.
“If there is any second line, pregnant,” Karolina said. “So, here.”
She handed me the test. I nearly fainted.
“I would say congratulations,” Karolina said. “We are elated to have another grandchild, but I am aware there are a lot of emotions here. I love you both. Ask if you need something.”
She patted Rick on the cheek lovingly and disappeared out the door.
I sat, holding the test. The light pink line glared at me. I was infuriated, upset, violated, and frightened. Rick stared at me, similarly surprised. I assumed this was how it ended. His love and attraction for me was gone. I felt him pulling away. Of course, he didn’t want a baby! Neither did I! He had a choice, but I did not.
Then, a strange thing happened.
Rick wrapped me up in his arms and held me tight. I released my sobs into his shoulder. Normally, I would hide these from him, but I felt like I both needed to let it out and was safe. I sobbed and sobbed until finally, we pulled apart. He hopped up to bring me a tissue and then sweetly dabbed my eyes as I tried to pull myself together.
“I’m so sorry,” I finally said.
“Why, Lex? You did nothing wrong.”
“You don’t want a baby. You’re frightened!”
“I didn’t say I didn’t want a baby. I mean, I didn’t want a baby, but does that mean I don’tnowwant a baby? I think those are different things.”
“I don’t want a baby. My mother died in childbirth. I’m not ready to die.”
“I am not about to let you die. I am sorry that happened. It must be scary, baby, but… it is so unlikely.”
“It doesn’t matter. God, I have no choice.”
“Not as a royal woman, no,” Rick said. “I feel awful right now. It took this long for me to knock someone up. It’s a wonder it took so long.”
“Rikard!”
“What? It’s true!”
“Not helping.”
He cupped my face in his hands. “Lex, I love you—all of you. If that means we must bump up the timeline a bit, I’ll manage. I love you too much to tell you no.”
Rick kissed me. Despite my runny tears and puffiness, he kissed me.
“Don’t worry about me,” Rick said. “Let’s keep you healthy, okay? Focus on you.”
I nodded. “Thank you for not hating me.”
“I couldn’t anymore. You are too good a person. You are the best person, Alexandra.”
Forty-Four
