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I was terrified. Confused. But most of all I felt this blossoming heat that kept growing in me until he was all I could think about. Him and the arousal that sure as hell wasn’t letting up.
Clearing my throat, rubbing my hands up and down my thighs and staring at the innkeeper, all I could do was nod and try and listen to what she was saying. I was stalling, dragging out the conversation with the innkeeper because the sun hadn’t fully set, and I couldn't leave the cottage yet. I was positioned strategically in the shadowy corner, the glow muted enough I didn't feel the energy sucking the literal lifeforce from me.
But I wasn't worried that she thought there was something wrong with me as I kept rambling questions. She genuinely seemed happy to talk, as if she were starving for socialization.
She’d seemed concerned with my staying in the room all day, but I’d told her I was still trying to adjust from traveling, which she accepted easily enough.
I started asking her about things to do around the village; hidden gems and natural attractions that she could suggest I check out, ones that were off the beaten path. I wanted to have some time alone with my thoughts, to sift and sort through what I felt and what this all meant.
What I knew without a doubt was that if that male figured out his mate was here, if he picked up on my scent, he’d hunt me down.
When a male in the Otherworld found their mate there wasn't anything in this world or in the ether that would or could stop them from finding her. They became the quintessential predator searching for their prey.
It was different for females in our world, where we might feel a change in us, an awakening—like I had. But I’d never feel that click in me the males did, that instinct that clawed at me and demanded I find my other half.
After finding out about a few places that were secluded, I decided I’d check out a small waterfall located a short distance from the village center, but deep enough in the woods that it would afford me privacy. The waterfall, I was told, was nestled in a network of shallow caves at the base of the mountains that surrounded the village.
The innkeeper assured me evening was the best time to go, as the moonlight would come down through the gaping crevice at the top of the mountain and reflect off the pool of water below.
“You take this,” she said in a sweet but very persistent motherly voice and shoved a satchel of food at me so I had something to eat during my short trip.
I clutched the cloth-wrapped package to my chest and gave her a smile. My stomach clenched as another hunger was starting to grow in me. I’d managed to consume blood before leaving the US, but I’d been in Europe for almost two weeks and was pushing the limit of how long I could safely go without satiating my other dietary needs.
I’d have to deal with that soon, but with the forest thick around the village, finding an animal shouldn't be an issue. Not that animal blood could fully quench that thirst or hunger, but it would buy me more time until I could figure something else out.
After a little wave and smile, I left out the front door but stopped and looked around. I half expected that male from last night to be hulking in the shadows, waiting to pounce on me.
I inhaled, not smelling anything but livestock, muck from the long day, and the lingering scents of the villagers from earlier.
But I didn’t smell anyone from the Otherworld, and as I exhaled, there was a part of me that felt relief, but another part that was disappointed.
Shaking off the conflicting emotions, I hurried through the village and followed her directions into the woods and toward the cave system. For the next twenty minutes I just enjoyed following the overgrown trail, the trees towering over me, the sounds of birds chirping and small animals scurrying about filling my head.
There was an array of aromas bursting in my nose and adding to a sense of freedom. The absolute freedom I felt in this moment was unlike anything I could ever experience back home. Ryeka, New York was a bustling, growing city. It was congested, and the smells, more times than not, were toxic and dirty because of the animals and far too many people living shoulder-to-shoulder.
The only solace I found in such a living space was the home Adryan was renovating, an ancient, massive structure situated on acres upon acres of untouched wooded land.
It was a long trip to the caverns, but I didn't mind. The quiet and being alone did me good, made me feel almost refreshed. I could see myself living in a place like this, where people were scarce. In fact, I wanted that, I realized. I didn't want to stay in Ryeka anymore, not when I had experienced this and realized how unhappy the city made me, even if I had plenty of open space at Adryan’s.
Because living with my crazy brother wasn’t exactly how I saw spending the rest of my life.
No, I decided, this, this is what I want.
But writing a letter to Adryan telling him I wasn't coming back to the city wasn't something he’d accept. And he deserved for me to tell him in person, to look him in the eyes and tell him that although I loved him dearly and we would always be bonded as family, I needed to start carving out a place in this world for me.
He’d give me a fight, be stubborn and argumentative, try to assert that annoying dominance and arrogance on me that worked so well on everyone else. But at the end of it all, I'd get what I wanted because no one would stop me.
Exhaling and feeling even more invigorated by my thoughts and plans, I stared at the base of the mountain, where I could see the almost tiny entrance that led to the network of caves within.
I moved through the small entrance, my hands on the rock to guide me inside. I made my way farther, deeper inside, smelling the fresh water and following it. And when I found the cavern, a little gasp of pleasure and happiness left me.
I stared at the waterfall, a shallow pool right below it. The water was clean and clear, falling from an opening up above and sliding down the back of the wall. The scent of earth and lack of any human, animal, or otherworld had me smiling. If someone had been here, it had been a very long time ago. Privacy.
If this wasn’t perfection, I didn’t know what was.
I stared at the pool once more, and without even thinking about it, started to take my clothes off until I stood in just my shift. I stepped into the cool water, ripples moving outward as I stepped farther into it. I waded to the center, the pool shallow enough that when I stood fully in, the water only came up to my waist. And then I lowered myself down so that I could lie back and just immerse myself.
I let my arms float out on either side of me and closed my eyes, just taking in the chill of the water and the feeling of the moonlight coming in from the opening above. Aside from the sound of the falls hitting the pool, there was this peacefulness, a quiet and stillness that surrounded me.
