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“Don’t patronize me. How would you feel if you found out from Preston that he’d fucked me?” I shock even myself at my harsh words.
He grabs my hand, tugging me toward him. “Has he, Daphne? Has he touched you? Kissed you? Fucked you the way I have?” His eyes are dark and piercing, his words said through gritted teeth as he looks down at me.
“No,” I say softly. “But if he had, I wouldn’t have hidden it from you.”
He scans my face, his gaze softening a little as he releases my hand. He reaches up and cups my face. “She was a mistake and I’ve told her as much. I never should have slept with her. I was grieving and then lonely and then just a fucking asshole who needed escape instead of facing my feelings about Mira. That’s why I didn’t tell you about it. I was, I am ashamed and now that I have to work with her through this deal, I didn’t want you to be worried that I was still sleeping with her or that there were any feelings or desires there. I’m sorry, I should have told you.”
“So you two have been hooking up on and off over the last four years?” I struggle to believe that he has no feelings for her if that’s the case.
“No. It didn’t happen until the last year. I was struggling and she reached out to me because she was as well. It was around the anniversary of Mira’s passing. I mean it, Daphne. I’ve never had feelings for her and I haven’t been with her since I met you.”
“Thank you for apologizing.”
He rests his forehead against mine, letting out a slow breath. “The thought of Preston or any man touching you makes me want to tear them limb from limb, baby. You’re mine, you understand me?”
I don’t know what to say or feel. I’m terrified of what I’m feeling for this man, but I’m also terrified of being consumed by him. I wasn’t ready to fall again; I still don’t know if I’m ready. Sometimes I feel like I’m still running from losing my mom and Carson and my broken relationship with my father. I don’t know if I have enough to give someone else, let alone myself.
“I— I need some time and space.” I reach up and wrap my hands around his, pulling them from me.
“Meaning what, Daphne?”
“I just don’t know if I can do this right now. I’m not angry with you but I can’t just pretend like I’m not falling for you and your daughter, knowing neither of us are fully healed from our past. I don’t want to be just a distraction for you until the next best thing comes along. I just can’t right now.” I shake my head as I choke back tears. I know I’m running; I know I’m scared, and his expression tells me he knows it too.
“Look at me.” His voice is back to demanding. “You have one week, Daphne. Get out of your head and stop overthinking this. We both know this is more than a distraction. One week and I’m coming for you.”
* * *
One week later…
“I said yessss!” Xana holds up her hand, a gorgeous pillow cut diamond catches the light as she wriggles her fingers.
“You said yes!” I shout back to her as I grab her hand to get a closer look at the ring. I throw my arms around her, hugging her tightly. “Oh, you deserve this so much. I’m so happy for you and Ryan.” I look at the ring again. “And damn, he did a really good job,” I say, pretending to be surprised like he didn’t consult me before designing it.
“You knew, didn’t you?” She narrows one eye at me.
“I knew about the ring, but I had no idea when he was going to do it. He wanted to design the perfect ring for you so he did ask me for my input.”
“I figured.” She laughs, then holds her hand up to admire it. “I can’t believe I’m a fiancée.” She turns to me. “Will you officially be my maid of honor?”
“Of course, whatever you need, I’ve got you covered. Let me grab some wine, and then you have to tell me all about how he proposed!” I jump off the couch, grabbing a bottle and two glasses, and settling in for the romantic story.
“And when I walked into the room, he had spelled out in rose petals and candles, will you marry me? I literally screamed so loud and jumped into his arms I forgot to say yes.”
We laugh and talk, already brainstorming ideas for the bachelorette party. “I feel like this is too big of news to stay in. I say we go dancing.” Xana and I haven’t gone out dancing in forever. I’m not even sure we still know how to let loose and have fun.
For as much as I want it to only be about Xana’s special moment, I also could really use a night away from my constant thoughts about Weston. He promised me a week and today marks the seventh day since I’ve seen or heard from him. I’ve thought about our last conversation every single day. I’ve contemplated my feelings, trying to talk myself out of wanting what I want with him, but no matter how many times I tell myself that I’m not ready, my heart says otherwise.
I haven’t told Xana anything about my conversation with Natalie… I haven’t told her about Natalie at all actually. I’m fully prepared to get my heart ripped out and stomped on, so the less people who know, the better. Besides, this is such a happy time in her life, I’m not about to be the one who brings her down. God knows she’s had to be my shoulder to cry on enough the last two years.
“Oh yes, can we, please? Wait, I can’t go out in this.” She points down to her jeans and hoodie.
“Come on. I still have so many dresses in my closet from back in the day.” We go through the dresses, having a little movie montage moment of trying them on and dancing around my room until we finally settle on the right outfits. I shimmy my way into a silvery blue body con dress that hugs every curve and dip of my body, then I strap on a mile-high pair of stilettos that lace halfway up my calf. Xana slips on a hot-pink satin minidress complete with matching pink heels.
“Damn, we definitely still have it,” Xana says as we look ourselves over in my bathroom mirror.
“We’re only twenty-seven, of course we still have it. Now, I’m not sure if still have the dance moves or the stamina to hang out past midnight.”
“Challenge accepted.” She laughs.
