For a moment that evening, her past hopes and dreams had smacked her in the face in the most painful way. Seeing Blake with his daughter, showing her the gentleness he’d once had for Charli, had brought with it a sharp pain, along with some anger.
The worst part was the doubts and insecurities that being around Blake had resurrected. For too long after he’d sent the message breaking up with her, she’d wondered if the reason he’d left her like that had been because he’d realized he could do better than her. Or maybe his family had convinced him he could do better than a chubby girl whose main goals in life had been to become a teacher and have a large family.
He’d taken her virginity, got her pregnant, then left her behind.
It was pretty clear from Amelia’s presence, however, that at some point, he’d found a woman he was willing to stick with.
Charli decided she didn’t want to chance Janessa coming home and finding her in such an emotional state. So, after she finished emptying the dishwasher, she made herself a cup of hot chocolate and grabbed a couple of cookies to take to her room.
Normally, she enjoyed the rare evenings when Layla stayed overnight with Jay and Misha or her parents. That night, though, she would have loved for her to be at the house to offer Charli a distraction.
Once in her room, Charli changed into her pajamas, then settled into her chair with a book, hoping to escape the mess of emotions the evening at the carnival with Blake had stirred up.
If a good story couldn’t distract her, then nothing could.
CHAPTER EIGHT
When Blake pulled into the parking lot of the church, he found a spot that wasn’t too close to the building. He shut off the truck, but then just sat there.
It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go to church. It was more that he wasn’t thrilled to be walking into a new situation yet again. He’d let himself be convinced by his aunt and Jay Halverson that Sunday School would be a good thing for Amelia, and he really hoped that was going to be the case.
When he’d first come to visit Jackson and his parents, he’d attended church with them. At first, he’d gone because he hadn’t really had anything better to do on a Sunday morning.
But later, he’d gone because Charli had caught his attention. It wasn’t until the summer was nearly over that he’d finally reached out to her on social media, and they’d begun to talk.
The next summer, he’d continued to go to church because he’d wanted to see Charli and spend some time around her. They hadn’t been able to acknowledge what they were to each other during that time. However, what he’d felt for her had been enough for him to attend church regularly, even though he’d really had no interest in spiritual things at that point.
In the first few years following his enlistment, he hadn’t gone to church at all. But then on a deployment he’d made friends with a man who was a Christian, and after they’d faced a tragic event on their base, Blake had been open to the Gospel message in a way he hadn’t been before.
It had been an amazing time for Blake, one that had changed his life in surprising ways. And as he’d attended services and Bible studies with an openness to learn about God that he hadn’t previously had, he’d also gained a new insight into Charli and her family, and the importance faith had played in their lives.
Now, he felt like he needed to apologize to Charli for not respecting her faith more. But in his defense, he just hadn’t known what it all meant. He had a much better understanding now, having learned and grown in his own faith.
And now he wanted that for Amelia. They hadn’t gone to church in Texas because he hadn’t been sure about introducing Amelia to another new situation, especially knowing they wouldn’t be staying there.
But Serenity was going to be their home, so it was time to venture into this part of their lives.
“Are we going in, Daddy?” Amelia asked from her seat. “I want to see Layla and Peyton again.”
Blake angled his rearview mirror so that he could see her in the back seat. “You realize they might not be in your class, right?”
“Yeah. I know. But Aunt Julia said she teaches the class I’ll be in.”
It was Amelia’s bravery and her willingness to actually go into a new situation that finally got him out of the truck. Once Amelia was beside him, he took her hand, and they walked across the parking lot to the doors of the church.
As they stepped into the foyer, he looked around, immediately spotting his aunt as she walked toward him with a big smile on her face.
“Oh, my darlings,” she said as she approached them. “I’m so glad to see you here.”
She bent to hug Amelia, then gave Blake one as well, holding him a little longer than she had Amelia. He appreciated her affection, especially since he’d had precious little of it over the past several years.
Even before he’d enlisted, his mom had never been exactly free with her affections, so the way Julia interacted with them was welcome. If she didn’t look so much like his mom, he would never have believed they were sisters.
Where his aunt was full of smiles, willingly giving out hugs and kind words, his mom was much more reserved. Her words were more likely to be ones of criticism than encouragement.
Blake wondered if the differences between them were partly because of the men they’d married. His dad had high expectations for those in his family, and it seemed that no one ever achieved them to his satisfaction.
Jackson’s dad was pretty much the opposite. The man had found success with his business, and Jackson worked alongside him, apparently fine with being in the family business.