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The mere idea of me finishing that sentence seems to send her into a panic. “I never said I liked him.”
“It’s okay if you like him,” I assure her, trying to be nice, but my words seem to piss her off.
“Of course it is. Of course you don’t care. Why would you? You’re only supposed to be my husband. Evidently, only Brynn Blakely can trigger your jealousy.”
“I don’t want to talk about her.”
“She’s why you don’t want to marry me.”
“Yes, she is. And your hook-up with Aiden is why I may not have to.”
She looks as if I just slapped her.
“I don’t want to be a dick to you, Sloane, I really don’t. It’s not your fault I changed my mind, and I’m sorry it made a mess for you, but I think there’s finally a way to clean it all up. I spoke with Aiden, and he’d like to take my place. It seems like you two have more of a connection than we did anyway, so maybe it’s a win for everybody.”
Sloane is quiet for a moment. Then she says softly, “And how did you find out about us, Killian?”
I don’t really know how to answer that. “Aiden… told me,” I say, despite it being only partially true. I guess he showed me. I stopped watching the video once I realized what it was and how it could be weaponized to finally get out of this goddamn engagement, but he had saved his number in the phone as well so I could reach out to him and hear the rest of his proposal.
I would be free to be with Brynn, and he would marry Sloane and take over her family legacy in my place.
There’s no way to spin it that doesn’t look like me just selling her off to the next highest bidder.
But I don’t care about Sloane, and while I have no ill will toward her, I’m not willing to sacrifice my happiness or Brynn’s for her. If she doesn’t like Aiden, that’s her problem. She wouldn’t have liked me, either.
“So, you think I should marry a man who seduced me just to blackmail me into marrying him so he can have my father’s legacy for himself? You think that’s my happily ever after?”
Although I haven’t come out and said anything like that, she must have enough of an idea of how it all went down. Maybe I’m not even the first person he shared that video with.
And it doesn’t sound great when she puts it like that.
But, as heartless as it sounds, that’s her problem. Not mine.
“I think… whatever Aiden’s flaws, you stand a better chance at having one with him than me,” I tell her honestly.
“Can you really not even stomach the idea of marrying me when it comes with so much, Killian? Do you realize what kind of life we could have? What is so wrong with me? What does she have that I don’t?”
“My heart.”
Her shoulders straighten, and she sucks in a sharp breath. “That was mean.”
“Maybe. But it’s the truth. I don’t want to hurt or embarrass you more than I already have, Sloane, but I know what you want, and I know I can’t give it to you. If you’re looking for a husband that’s going to be faithful to you, you’re better off taking your chances with Aiden because it won’t be me.”
Her spine is stiff, her shoulders straight. She wears her propriety like a shield. “I see. And Brynn’s okay with this?”
“Brynn doesn’t have a say in the matter. She begged me to stop in the woods last night and I didn’t. I won’t next time, either.”
I imagine it’s pretty insulting to be told I’d rather force myself on someone else than take what Sloane has tried to give me willingly, but that’s the truth, no matter how brutal it might be.
Feeling the need to bring the conversation away from Brynn and back to us, I say, “I’ve tried to resign myself to this, Sloane, but do you really want a man who has to resign himself to a life with you?”
A tiny smile plays around her pink lips, but there’s no humor behind it. “No, you haven’t. If you want to end our engagement, fine, but don’t lie to me, Killian. You did not try.”
I’m quiet for a beat. “You’re right. I didn’t try.”
I didn’t want to.
She’s not the one I want to try for.
