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“Did Mr. Saunders stay behind?” he asks.
I nod. “Yes, his mother was interested in speaking to him and the champagne didn’t agree with me,” I say, still in my proper, political society tone. It’s far too easy to lie like this.
I breathe out in relief as I lean my still-flushed face against the cool glass of the back window. It soothes the heat burning across my skin and I inhale deeply, replacing the oxygen I just released.
“You, okay?” Russell asks, his tone kind and understanding, as always.
“Yeah,” I answer. “Just been a while since I’ve been under the microscope like that. There’s a reason I left my mother and father’s world. His parents are… interesting.”
He doesn’t ask any more questions and I appreciate the silence that falls over us. It’s not necessarily comforting but the knowledge that I can break it anytime I want makes it welcome. Having the control back for a moment after being without it for so long is soothing, and I drift in and out of consciousness, knowing I’m safe for now.
We come up to the hotel, my current home, after about an hour. I snap awake as soon as I feel the car roll to a stop. Back to the safety of the city, back to anonymity. The engine shuts off and I rub lightly at my eyes, trying not to ruin my makeup any more than it already has been. I know by now, with all that I’ve been up to it’s probably fucked to hell. But that doesn’t matter as long as it’s decent enough that I can get back to the room without rumors flying. I pull down the visor and check things over, dabbing here and there to put things back into place, before Russell opens the door and offers me his hand.
I laugh. “There’s no need to be so formal with me.”
The smile I shoot him is affectionate, something I would give a father figure that actually deserved it.
“You warrant it,” he says. “For putting up with Mr. Saunders and, most of all, his family.”
He escorts me back into the entryway of the hotel. “Y’know, Adrian isn’t that hard to ‘put up with’ most of the time. Occasionally we have a nasty argument, but I’ve found I like his company.”
“You are one of the rare ones who sees what he has to offer then,” Russell says pensively.
“You were probably one of the first ones who saw that,” I say, mocking his words.
He smiles secretively, not answering me out loud, but there is a lot behind that silent expression. How long has Adrian been without someone? Did he have someone before Russell? I look at the man from the corner of my eyes until he waves me forward into Adrian’s private elevator.
“Goodnight, miss,” he nods.
“I hope to god you drop that act tomorrow,” I say as I poke at the button.
Before the door closes, I see his lips twitch. “As long as you aren’t wearing an evening gown.”
I laugh as the doors whoosh shut and ride the eerily silent elevator up to the penthouse suite. I know once I’m home, the girls will make me forget all about everything that happened. I don’t think I will feel ready to face Adrian anytime tonight, so I plan to go to bed early to avoid him.
Finally alone as I walk down the hallway toward Adrian’s suite, I think of how I just tucked tail and ran from a situation that shouldn’t have happened. I should never have let things get so out of hand at the party. But as soon as he kissed me, as soon as I tasted the smooth caramel notes of scotch on his tongue, I wanted more. I felt sparks jolt over my skin and my body yearned to melt into him right there.
How long have I wanted to be with him like that? I knew from the first day I laid eyes on him in the lobby that I found him attractive. Any woman with working eyes Adrian would feel their heartbeat quicken. But that doesn’t mean I want to be with him. Could I even try?
I think hard as I open the door and am thoroughly distracted by two sets of paws landing squarely on my hips. I push the dogs off and scold them lightly, knowing that Adrian would never allow that kind of behavior.
They whine, unhappy with being told they can’t celebrate to the fullest, but once I finally shower them with pets and affection, they settle down soon enough. I decide to feed them before going to my room to change, since I know Adrian won’t be able to escape his mother anytime soon if she is anything like mine. I’ve seen him feed his dogs often enough I know just how to do it, even with the special ground meat toppers he gives them. I press a kiss to both their noses before turning down the hall, feeling my shoulders slump with frustration and despair as soon as I’m away from their happy energy.
I can’t believe I was so dumb. He’s my boss and I’m still in this stupid contract marriage for another five and a half months. I rub my hand across my face in irritation. As I close the door behind me, the full-length mirror on the wall allows me a glimpse of the wrinkles in my dress. I sigh as I run my fingers down it. If I look close enough, I can see a stain from where Adrian’s lips had been fused to my nipples.
It had felt so good, like he knew exactly what I needed. But… I shake my head because I can’t let myself continue to think about what happened. I need it to be in the past, I need to forget about it if I’m going to make it through the coming weeks and months.
I change into pajamas and walk out of my room, just long enough to grab a drink of water and write Adrian a note that I’ve taken care of the dogs’ food. Then I crawl into bed, wanting more than anything for sleep to claim me.
It doesn’t though, instead I’m awake for at least another hour. I’m not sure because I refuse to torture myself by looking at the time. Instead, I just try to bore myself to sleep by counting the wood grain in the ceiling in the dark. I can barely see it and I’m certain most of what I’m counting is hallucinations of shifting lights in the darkness.
After a while, I hear the front door creak open and then click shut. The sound of Adrian’s voice drifts down the hall toward me and I freeze, rotating so that I’m staring at the wall instead of the ceiling. Like a child, I slow my breathing, deepen each inhale so it looks a little more like I’m sleeping. Footsteps come down to the space right outside my door and they pause outside it.
“Amelia?” he says, his voice low and soft as if he is checking if I’m awake.
I hold my breath, hoping he doesn’t hear me. But I know he can’t, not with how silent the entire suite is. I wait until I hear him mumble to himself, and then the sound of his retreating steps as he walks away. I sigh in relief, realizing he is holding true to our rules and that he is letting my room stay a safe space.
I shift for a moment, rolling onto my back and sinking back into bed. Knowing he is home for some reason makes me more comfortable than I was before.
