Page 70 of Vampires Don't Suck


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I smiled at her. “Thanks.”

She gave me a wry smile and headed for the door. “I’m going to go see what Gabby’s up to.”

It didn’t take much time for Cross to come in looking like the immaculate junior senator.

“Angel, you called,” he said, raising a brow.

I held up my fingers and ticked them off. “Jessica, cultists, sword, and money. Is there any way to sell off the Montaine estate? I want to set up a college fund for my friend’s daughter.”

He shook his head. “Jessica is mine. I’m looking forward to the hunt and you can’t object after you had all the fun the other day. All I did was play virgin sacrifice. It makes me want to do something about it.”

“Like kill anyone who tries to turn you into a virgin sacrifice?”

He flashed a grin. “Well, if you’re going to get married, who will I have to flirt with? I might have to get married so that I can hang out with you, otherwise your sweetheart might get jealous and eat my heart out. The cultists are all securely held by my private corp. They are very reliable, and if we did lose their leader, I have his scent. The sword is on me. I’ll keep it on me until I deliver it to the Holy Order of the Swords of Truth, and no, you can’t keep it. You were insane to hold on to it as long as you did. I was joking when I dared you to steal from them.” He gave me a stern frown that melted into a smile. “You look like a real bride. And happy. You look terrified, but happy. As for money, you have more than enough for a college fund as well as buying half the city if you wanted it. Mother Mercy didn’t dispose of it like she led us to think. Oh, and she’s here.”

I felt the blood leave my extremities, including my head. I slumped over with my fingers at my temples. “Mother Mercy is coming to my wedding? Did you tell her about it?”

“I told you that she was coming for your book. She’s determined to talk to you about it.”

“I changed my mind. You should assassinate her.”

He looked properly horrified, like he hadn’t suggested it himself a dozen times. “I can’t assassinate Mother Mercy at your wedding. What if she’s here for sentimental reasons?”

I snorted. “Idiot. Like she’s ever felt anything sentimental in her life. Still, I don’t suppose she can ask me to come back to work for her now that I’m the Librarian and came out as Elizabeth Montaine.” I nodded, feeling slightly better. “I’m not as good at being two-faced as you. There’s no way she’d want me back.”

“Ah, the compliments you throw my way are enough to weaken my knees.” He kissed my cheek and pulled away, wrinkling his nose. “Why do you smell like oranges and jasmine? Those scents don’t go together.”

“They’re the best! They’re as good as oranges and peppermint.”

“Which is also vile. It must be love, poisoning your sense and your senses. I’ll see you on the other side. I’ll be wearing a nice long senator robe, so be braced for my gorgeousness.” He gave me another kiss on my other cheek and then slipped out, leaving me to hyperventilate alone.

I stared at myself in the mirror and couldn’t tell whether I was beautiful or just terrified. The dress was a rich white with gold trim, reminding me of white marble veined with heavenly gold, but there was a demon beneath that creamy skin, and that veil of impossibly delicate lace perched on golden curls was probably too much. Did I look like a cake topper or a public figure making an impression? Mother Mercy was here? Why would she come when I was already feeling stressed out?

Katrina knocked briefly before she came in, bouncing with excitement. “Everything is ready. Come on, I’m going to help with your train since I’m the closest the Scholar has to a child. I offered to wear pink, but for some reason, people thought that would give the wrong impression.” She flashed her fangs at me and then we were moving.

My chest was still tight from breathing infernal air, and I couldn’t move as quickly as I liked, but apparently marrying was more urgent than anything else. Katrina gave me directions as I walked as quickly as possible, which was still slow, down a maze of hallways I wasn’t familiar with. The laboratory was a maze. Finally, we came out in the garden, the air heavy with oranges and jasmine.

Haunting music floated around me, classical guitar and harp with a dusky flute and drums, pounding the most interesting rhythm, not quite war, but definitely not the wedding march. It suited how I felt perfectly. Mirabel must be weaving her magic. Somewhere in the shadows beyond the rows of orange trees were the Scholar’s guests, and Mother Mercy.

We didn’t start at the very end of the orange walk, so it only took a few minutes to reach the clearing near the waterfall.

Michael turned towards me and for a moment I couldn’t breathe, could only ache with every fiber of my being to close the distance between us. I loved him, even if he was too handsome. I smiled at him and he hesitantly smiled back. I forgot about everything else as I walked slow step by slow step, closer and closer to my forever love in his blue silk suit, the one that came with wings.

The music swelled as I got closer, passing the rows of seated guests while blossoms drifted down, pale between the floating orbs of golden light.

His eyes burned with frightening intensity, but I wasn’t frightened anymore. I wanted him to hold me as tightly as I’d hold him. I finally reached him, grabbing his hand tighter and tighter until he held me back almost as tight, until his claws came out, holding me so carefully. He wouldn’t ever let me go. A wave of dizzying happiness went through me as I struggled to breathe evenly and then Cross cleared his throat and began.

“Dearly Beloved, we are gathered together today—” His uncreative opening was interrupted by a scream of battle and a flash of heavenly gold from above.

I whirled around and reached for my file, but of course it wasn’t there. I missed it already. The bright gold resolved into the shape of a flying horse and rider as it swooped over the orange trees, coming down on the runway that I’d walked down a few moments ago.

Holy Order of the Swords of Truth, we were all going to die.

He was as gorgeous as his fiery flying steed, both of them looking like they were made out of molten gold, but once he’d dismounted and some of the gold dripped off him and the horse, leaving gold and glowing footprints behind as he walked towards us, he looked slightly less gold, but no less terrifying.

The harp fumbled and then the music ended, leaving ominous silence as the warrior came towards us. What was his rank? I couldn’t remember half the ranks of the largest and most deadly order in the world.

He stopped fifteen feet away, bowed respectfully and then stood at ease, feet apart, hands behind him as though he didn’t have a dozen weapons behind his back that he could use if he wanted to obliterate all of us.

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