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My conversation with Ratchet kept coming back to me as I sat in my room and thought about what life had in store for me.
“You said a lot of harsh things to that boy,” he’d started out the minute we got to his office. I figured he was about to tell me that I was never welcome at the clubhouse again, but he shocked me.
“It was all true.”
“Yeah, I think we all felt that. Not sure where the kid’s head is these days, but I want you to know that whether he chooses to be a man and own up to his responsibilities or not, you have the club backing you where that baby is concerned.”
“I appreciate that.”
“Your brother told me you’re working nights at the Pig.” I nodded while chuckling inwardly at the nickname given to the grocery store where I worked. “Pulling those heavy pallets around and throwing stock all night ain’t the best job to have when you’re pregnant.”
“I’ve been looking for something I can do during the day that won’t be as taxing, but there’s not a lot around here.”
“How strung up are you on day work?”
“I guess it doesn’t really matter, I’m already used to night shifts, but figured by the time the baby comes, it might be easier to find help caring for it while I’m at work, if it was a day job.”
“Smart that you’re already thinking that far ahead.”
“I have to.”
Ratchet tapped his cigarette pack against the desk, and I could tell he was itching to light one up but was being respectful of my condition. Still, I just sat there and watched. Tap. Tap. Tap. Finally, he brought his attention back to me.
“Normally, I wouldn’t put a potential future brother in this position, but I’m gonna do it anyway and explain to you my reasoning. If you don’t agree with me, then you can walk out that door and never look back. Even if you walk out that door, if you change your mind, what I’m about to offer is yours.”
“That sounds ominous.”
He laughed at me like I’d been telling a joke, but I was completely serious. My nerves were about to send me off the couch and out the door before I even heard Ratchet’s crazy proposal.
“Your dad was a good friend of mine. Was sorry to see him pass. Even sorrier to see the life he lived with your mom. One of the reasons I haven’t already pushed Tripp’s membership through was because I was giving him a chance to take another path and not repeat the same mistakes your father made.”
I nodded and took no offense to the fact that my brother and I were a result of Dad’s mistakes. I knew what he was getting at with that part.
“I’d be a shit of a man if I didn’t take care of Jagger’s little girl. Fuck the bylaws.”
I knew what those bylaws stated. If I wasn’t a member, a whore, or an old lady the only time I’d be welcome at the clubhouse would be family days. I didn’t understand why that mattered, as I didn’t plan on coming to hang out and watch as my baby’s father cozied up to the woman he knew would be bad news for our kid.
“Gonna offer you a job slinging drinks at the bar. Five nights a week, weekends are a must, and that means you’re gonna see some shit you’d probably rather not. Means you might see more of your brother than you’d like if you stick around after he’s patched in.” Again, I nodded because I knew he was talking about the way the men of the club openly had sex with the club girls. That wouldn’t bother me.
“I’m not a delicate little flower.”
He chuckled. “Wouldn’t expect Jagger and Chrissy’s kid to be anything of the sort, even if she did keep you away from club life.” He glanced down at something on his desk before he looked back up at me. “I’m hoping for an added benefit to you working here, besides the pay and easier work.”
“What’s that?”
“Hoping seeing you nearly every fucking day will light a fire under that boy’s ass and show him what he’ll be missing out on by staying with that stuck-up cunt.”
It was my turn to laugh. I didn’t think Tripp realized what an uphill battle he would have with June as his old lady if that was what he chose. Ratchet had been there to see what sticking it out with my mom did to my dad, and to us kids. He already saw the writing on the wall where Tripp was going down the same muddy path my dad traveled.
“I see that boy taking my place one day. Would be a toss-up between him and your brother, but I know Mack don’t want that shit yet. He might change his mind about leading one day. Tripp won’t ever be good enough long as he has a ball and chain dragging him away from the club every time he takes another step forward.”
That was where Ratchet lost me.
“If that’s what you expect, then you’re no better than my brother with his plotting and believe me I’m pissed at him about that shit too. He’s the reason I ever got my hopes up and set my sights on Tripp. Look how that turned out. I’m going to be a single mother before I turn twenty. Mom’s parting words to me were to get away from my brother and the club or I would never be able to beat teen pregnancy. She was right about that one thing at least.”
“Well, think about it, even if it means leaving Tripp out of the equation. Come work here, sling drinks, maybe cook a bit if you know how. I’ll double whatever you’re making at the Pig.”
“I don’t want any part of some ploy to get Trip to ditch his girl.”
