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“I don’t know. I can’t get a hold of her. For over three hours.” I glanced at my phone screen again, like I’d been obsessively doing all morning, then amended my remark. “Well, make that four.” I slammed the top drawer of my desk shut so hard that the picture of Gray I kept on top fell over.
“Goddammit,” I said and set the frame upright again.
“Okay, calm down a bit, please, or you’ll be a danger behind the wheel.” He leaned a hip on my desk, blocking me from leaving. He’d get his way if it cost him physical harm, apparently.
“Yesterday she got violently sick at my family’s church. She slept most of the day and seemed fine around dinner.” I thought briefly about the incredible way we spent the evening and grinned. “Waaay better than fine, actually.” I chuckled, trying to give him enough information without saying anything too personal. “This morning she was solid too.” I shook my head in confusion. “I can’t imagine why she’s ghosting me, and every bad scenario I can imagine has been taunting me while I sit here.”
Elijah quietly stared at me. When I finally raised my chin toward him, asking him What? without speaking, the bastard started laughing.
“You’re so fucked it’s ridiculous. She’s got you chasing your tail, man, and I’m loving it. I remember being in your shoes not that long ago.”
“I won’t survive too many days like this,” I admitted.
“So what made her sick? Anxiety like her sister? Or I guess it could’ve been a twenty-four-hour bug or something since you said she was fine this morning.”
“Anxiety had a lot to do with it, but…” I stalled there, and he waited patiently for me to finish the thought. I didn’t want to betray her privacy, though. Shit, this was her brother-in-law I was talking to. The very first person he’d go shooting his mouth off to was her sister. I was sure of it.
At the same time, I really needed to talk to someone about what was going on. I was scared I wasn’t handling her drinking issues properly, and I didn’t want to let her down.
“Spill it, man. You’ll feel so much better just getting it off your chest. You know whatever you say to me stays right here, right? I know I’m married to your sister-in-law, but we need to vent from time to time too. You can trust me.”
Elijah was the most honest person I’d ever met. There were times the characteristic made him very unpopular because people didn’t always want to hear the truth. But I knew if he was vowing something to me, he meant it.
After exhaling a long, slow breath, I admitted my greatest fear. “I think she has a drinking problem.”
His reaction was steady, almost like he might have thought the same thing at some point himself. Okay, that was probably me projecting, but there was no way I was the only one who saw the way my wife could throw drinks down like a frat boy.
“I’m sure you’re not saying that without cause. Personally, I’ve seen the girl shitfaced more times than not, but that’s not really a fair observation because we’ve been celebrating one thing or another every time I’ve been with the family,” he offered with a kind smile. “Also, now that Hannah and I have dried out with the baby coming, it seems like everyone and their mom drinks too much.”
I chuckled at that comment. I had experienced the same thing whenever I was the designated driver out with a group of friends. Instantly, I turned into everyone’s babysitter.
Maybe I was overreacting.
Then I remembered that damn cough medicine bottle I found under the bathroom sink. Yeah, I wasn’t overreacting at all. That was not something most people would claim trying in their life, let alone before meeting their new in-laws at Sunday mass!
No matter what, I wasn’t comfortable spilling that tea to my boss. He could reassure me twenty more times, but that skeleton needed to stay locked in our marital closet forever.
“Have you talked to her about your feelings?” Elijah asked, and something about the tone of voice or the way he cocked his head to the side while posing it made me bark out a laugh.
“Sorry.” I snorted. “You sound so much like a stereotypical shrink it’s uncanny. Yes, I’ve expressed my concern, my displeasure, my alarm on an occasion or two.” I shook my head. “She blows me off every time I bring it up.”
“Okay, I can picture her doing that. Have you considered getting professional intervention? Are you to that point? I guess what I’m asking is, is the problem that big, or is it something that bothers you and apparently no one else?”
I had to give the man credit. He was very good at getting me to organize my thoughts and feelings on the matter, if nothing else. I thought about the question longer than the others so far and finally answered honestly.
“I don’t think it’s just me. But these women of ours are very headstrong.”
“Preach on, brother. Preach on,” Elijah muttered.
I grinned. “She doesn’t see anything wrong with her behavior, even though I’ve seen her turn to alcohol as a coping device on numerous occasions. And seriously, we haven’t been together that long. It’s not the usual kind of social drinking she cons herself into thinking it is, either.”
As I was telling my brother-in-law the situation, I really heard my own words. And I didn’t like them. The person I needed to talk with about all these concerns was the woman I’d married.
“I think we can get through it. I’m just worried about her. I’ve really fallen for the girl. Hard. I want things to work out between us, regardless of how irresponsible our relationship’s start was. You know? I’m just worried about her.” Repeating that last comment had me questioning who I was really trying to convince.
“Yeah, man, I get it. And I understand the need to care for your woman better than a lot of people do. Trust me.” He was quiet for a long pause, and I knew from experience he was really measuring his next remark.
“I’m not sure you want my opinion.” He studied me with very attentive ice-green eyes and then added, “But I’m going to give it to you anyway.” He laughed. “Go talk to her. Everything you’ve brought up in this conversation needs to be handled with her.”
